Page 116 of The Tartan Thesis

Torin never comes to the shared office anymore. I keep catching myself glancing up at the door when it opens, hoping he might walk in, drop his bag, and sit down like nothing happened. He never does. And the rest of my classmates have noise-cancelling headphones, so no one notices my distress. Except Maeve.

I feel her looking before I see it. Another quick glance at me over her laptop, checking in. I give her a tight smile and look back down at my notes. I know that look—quirked lips, sad eyes, furrowed brow—but pity isn’t going to make these feelings go away, nor is it going to bring Torin back.

I scrub a hand over my face and lean back in my chair, staring at the ceiling for a second. I need to do something else. Anything that isn’t this. It’s late enough in the day here that The Pigeons should be awake by now. I gave them the gist of the argument after it happened, and they were ready to hop on planes to comfort me, but I’d declined, told them absolutely not to come to Scotland, and I’ve avoided discussing Torin ever since. Maybe now’s the time.

I pick up my phone and shoot them a message.

Beau

I can’t focus - all I can think about is Torin and how I screwed it up.

Juliana

was wondering when you’d bring this up again

Juliana

and i’m not saying you’re perfect but there were two of you involved

Lucas

Truly, you may have said things you regret, but he was being irrational. Please don’t accept all the blame.

Juliana

did he ever tell you what made him so mad??

Beau

No, he blocked my number and ignores me completely when I try to talk to him at school.

Juliana

rude

Lucas

What do you want to do about it?

Beau

That’s the problem - I don’t know what to do. Tbh, I don’t know if there’s anything I can do.

Juliana

we can fly over and get you v drunk

Juliana

would that help?

Lucas

Yes! Have you tried martinis? They might be the answer!

Beau

I don’t think depressants are going to make the situation better, but I’ve always got a hankerin’ for bleu cheese olives.