Page 116 of Blue Jean Summer

He was simply willing to do whatever it took to get exactly what he wanted. Just like he had to all those women. Just like he had when he offered Hayes political favors in exchange for support.

Hayes reached for my phone, but I waved him off. This was my battle to fight, but I wasn’t going to fight it. I was done.

“That won’t be necessary, Governor Grant.”

“So, you’ll consider a statement of support?” he pressed.

“No. It won’t be necessary for you to contact me again.” And with that, I hung up on the man who had fathered me.

Hayes immediately scooped me up into his arms and held me as I cried. I hadn’t even moved my finger off the end call button.

“I’m so sorry, Cath,” he murmured as he held me against his chest and sheltered me in his arms. “I’m so fucking sorry.”

I clung to him, trembling, as sobs shook me to the bone.

Hayes murmured unnecessary apologies as he pressed his lips to my cheek and temple, kissing away the tears.

I choked as twenty-five years of hope and yearning began to crumble. Twenty-five years of “what ifs” and “if onlys.”

If only I were good enough for him.

What if he had chosen me?

If only I were wanted.

“It hurts,” I admitted in a strangled cry.

Hayes held me tighter. “I know.”

“I’m tired,” I said through aching gasps for air. “I’m so fucking tired.”

Hayes cradled my head against his chest. “Rest.”

I sniffed and tried to wipe away each tear that tracked down my face, but they just kept coming. “Go on. Say it.”

“Say what?” he murmured as he rubbed my back.

“I told you so.”

Hayes cradled my jaw in his hands and pressed a kiss to my forehead. “I’m not doing that.”

“You should.”

The tip of his nose brushed along the bridge of mine. “You’re sacred to me. I turned my life upside down to protect this land, and you’re infinitely more precious. Just imagine what I’ll do to protect you.”

“I’m sorry,” I croaked.

Hayes peered down. “Why on earth are you sorry, sweetheart?”

“Because he was exactly who you showed him to be,” I whimpered. “And I didn’t want to believe you. I wanted to—”

“You wanted to have hope,” Hayes said softly. “Because you still have hope. Sometimes hope fucking hurts. But that hope is the most beautiful thing about you.”

My tears soaked the soft cotton of his white T-shirt. There was only one place I wanted to be, and I was already there.

I didn’t think you fell in love with a person. You fell in love with their eyes and the way they saw the world. You fell in love with their heart and what they ached for. You fell in love with their wounds, just as they did yours. You fell in love with their mind. You fell in love with the way their hand fit into yours as you navigated the maze of life.

Arms were the one thing you didn’t fall for. They were for falling into.