Page 113 of Diary of a Biker Queen

The doors opened, and then I was moving down the aisle, flanked either side by my proud parents.

My mother hissed at me through her fake smile. “Why do you look like you’re being led to your execution? Smile, girl!”

I did as I was told because it was easier than arguing. I forced my mouth into something that might have resembled happiness, but it apparently wasn’t good enough for my father. He peeked at me as we slow marched down the aisle.

“Don’t ruin this for me, Nyah. This is a good match for you.”

I realized in that moment I hated him, and I couldn’t keep it inside a second longer. And that in marrying Carlos Guerra, maybe I didn’t have to. I paused and twisted to face my father, keeping my expression schooled into something the crowd of people staring at me might mistake for father-daughter affection. “I’m doing what you want, aren’t I? Be grateful. And remember who you’re speaking to. I’m about to become Mrs. Guerra.”

He stared at me in shock.

My mother clearly overheard and stifled a gasp at the same time.

I couldn’t walk another inch with the two of them, when they were nothing but my enemies.

For show only, I leaned in and kissed my mother’s cheek, and then my father’s. I pulled my hands free from both of them and walked the rest of the way up to the altar alone, joining Carlos standing at the top, his brother, Enzo, beside him as his best man.

Carlos smiled at me, and for the first time, I honestly felt the warmth in it. He took my hand and helped me up the last stair. His gaze swept over me, but it wasn’t in the harsh, leering way he had when I’d lived in his home.

This time, it was with the affection of a man who might have actually cared.

It shocked me to my core to see real emotion in his normally cold eyes.

He cleared his throat. “My son would have thought you beautiful in that dress, Nyah.”

My heart clenched at the mention of Luca.

The priest opened his mouth to say something but stopped when Carlos ignored him and stepped closer to me, guiding me gently into his arms. He held me for a long moment, hugging me, breathing slowly, like he was trying to get himself together and covering it so all the vultures watching us didn’t notice.

He stepped back just enough for me to see the emotion in his eyes and hear the sincerity when he said, “It’s proper to say the traditional vows. But I wanted to make you a promise before we do.” He clutched my arms, his voice only loud enough for the two of us, and probably the priest and Enzo to hear. “I want this second chance, Nyah. Losing Luca…” He pressed his lips together and breathed through his nose for a second, trying to get himself under control before he continued. He pressed a hand against my belly. “I won’t lose another heir. I’ll be good to you, and to him.” He smiled down at his hand on my belly. “My grandson, soon to be my son.”

I stared at Carlos’s face, and for the first time since I’d agreed to stand here and marry him, I felt hope. There was something different about him. Something gentler. Kinder. Something that made me believe losing Luca had completely gutted him in the same way it had me. That maybe we shared the same grief over that.

I suddenly had hope this man I was about to marry could be more like his son. Hard and cold to some, but gentler and kinder with those he loved.

Maybe that love could extend to me. He would never have my heart, that would always be owned by Dax and Lynx and Luca. But maybe we could be friends. Maybe I could live a happy life beneath his roof, never having a man to touch and hold me in the way his son and Dax and Lynx had, but a good life, where my baby never felt the way Luca had.

“What do you say, Nyah?” Carlos said in a voice barely above a whisper. “Will you marry me?”

When I nodded and let Carlos have both my hands so the ceremony could begin, my brain whispered I was making the right decision, even if my heart screamed no.

My heart didn’t get a say in my life anymore. I’d tried that, and it had failed miserably. All I had left now was to be smart.

I looked over at the priest. “Please begin.”

Carlos beamed at me, a genuine smile that was so much like Luca’s I wished he’d stop. I stared down at our joined hands instead and let the priest’s words wash over me.

“Do you consent to being married beneath the eyes of God and in accordance with the law on this day?”

“I do,” I forced out.

“Do you, Nyah Matish, take this man to be your lawfully wedded husband, to have and to hold from this day forward?”

“I do.”

“Do you agree to love an honor him above all others?”

“I do.”