Page 55 of Surrogate For My Best Friend’s Man 2

“Nothing.” I replied.

“Good.” She looked back at Shante. “You better stop acting like you don’t have a brother. Deuce might get on my last damn nerve, but that’s still your brother.”

Shante nodded. “Yes, ma’am.”

Grandma shook her head. “I raised y’all better than this neither one of y’all can seem to make it to the courthouse.”

Shante and I looked at each other. Grandma sucked her teeth. “Lord, give me strength.”

That had all three of us laughing. Even Grandma couldn’t hold her straight face. “Now eat your food before it gets cold.”

I picked my fork back up. “Yes, ma’am.”

For the first time in what felt like forever, I felt a little lighter. I still had a lot on my mind. But sitting at Grandma Lorraine’s table reminded me that I wasn’t alone and sometimes, that’s exactly what I needed. After we finished eating, we sat around Grandma Lorraine’s table a little longer, talking about nothing important. At least, that’s what it felt like and I needed that. Eventually, I grabbed my purse and stood up.

“I’m about to head out. I gotta go by my mama’s house to check on Brittany..”

Shante nodded and grabbed her things. We hugged Grandma before heading outside. “Call me when y’all get where you’re going,” Grandma yelled behind us.

“Okay!” I yelled back.

Shante laughed. “She still treats us like we are teenagers.”

“Because we act like it sometimes.”

She laughed.

We got in our cars and pulled off. I noticed how Shante kept getting quiet and playing over her food. It was like she was in deep thought. I wasn’t going to keep asking if she was okay. If she wanted to tell me something, she’d tell me.

Something else I noticed was Malik hadn’t called. Not once, normally that man stayed on Shante’s ass. Checking where she was, checking if she ate or if she needed anything. Especially now that she was pregnant. If something was wrong between them, she’d tell me when she was ready. “Malik better not be on no bullshit.” I mumbled to myself. She was sitting here carrying his babies, and if that man thinks he’s about to start playing with her, we're gonna have a fucking problem. I don’t care what he got going on. If he hurts her while she’s pregnant, I’m coming for ass.

Something about her just didn’t feel right. I didn’t know what it was but I knew Shante and whatever was bothering her she wasn’t telling me. My phone sat in the cupholder, I glanced at it and there were no missed calls from Deuce. I turned the radio up and headed toward my mama’s house. I needed to see my baby. And after that I needed to figure out where the hell I was going to sleep tonight because the Holiday Inn had gotten enough of my money.

KIM

Isat on the edge of my bed staring at the wall, trying to make sense of the shit Deuce had said to me. He really told me to stay the fuck away from him. That was the part I couldn’t wrap my head around. I had sacrificed a lot for that man. I accepted being kept in the shadows because he always made me believe there was a reason.

I missed out on holidays, family functions, and birthdays. All the little things women in real relationships got to have without begging for them. I couldn’t even walk into a room with him without wondering who might recognize me and I swallowed all that shit because I loved him.

I thought eventually it would be worth it.

Then there was the baby that was something I wanted more than anything. When things didn’t work out naturally, I agreed to the craziest arrangement imaginable because Deuce told me he would make it right and I believed him.

Now here I was with two babies on the way, a man sitting in the county, and no idea where the hell I stood with him. I wiped my face. “What the fuck did I do to deserve this?” That question kept circling my head. But one thing bothered me more than everything else, he really thought I set him up.

I knew my father was from the FBI and I knew exactly what kind of man he was when it came to his job. Once he smelled something wrong, he didn’t stop digging but Deuce knew that too. He knew I could’ve opened my mouth a long time ago. I could’ve told my father about the trucking company. I could’ve told him what I knew about Deuce’s business and given him names, but I didn’t and I protected Deuce.

Even when protecting him meant lying to my own father. Even when it meant putting myself in a position where I could look guilty by association. I never told my father what Deuce was doing with those trucks. Not because I didn’t know but because I loved him.

That was what Deuce didn’t understand. He thought the FBI came after him because I talked. But my father didn’t need me to tell him anything. He was a damn FBI agent, he knew how to investigate and build a case.

And now Deuce was sitting in the county jail convinced his own side piece had turned on him. I laughed bitterly. “After all this time?” I shook my head. “You really don’t know me at all.” I said to myself.

I picked up my phone and opened Deuce’s picture. My thumb hovered over his name. I wanted to call, I wanted to cuss him out. I wanted to ask him how he could look me in my face and accuse me of something like that. But I already knew how that conversation would go. He’d tell me I was the problem and to leave him alone.

And my dumb ass probably still be sitting here afterward crying over his ass. I tossed the phone onto the bed. I hated how much power that man still had over me. I was still the one sitting here trying to figure out how to prove I hadn’t betrayed him. When the truth was simple, I would’ve never turned Deuce in. I loved that man enough to keep his secrets.

And somehow that still wasn’t enough for him. I couldn’t sit around watching Deuce’s life fall apart. I needed to do something but before I could even figure out what, my mind kept going back to that visit. The way he looked at me and the way he barely wanted to sit across from me and those words leave me the fuck alone.