Page 123 of Vows of Ruin

But I take a step back, then another. “I…” My throat closes. “I think I’m going to be sick.”

Before anyone can stop me, I shove past Riot, past Elias, past the table, and I run. Down the hall. Bare feet slapping against the floor. Hugo is chasing two steps behind me. If I had stayed in that room a second longer, I would have broken into pieces I can’t put back together.

The hallway blurs as I run. The walls feel too close, the air too tight, my lungs clawing for something that won’t come. Hugo’s nails click frantically behind me, ragged as he tries to keep up. I don’t stop. I can’t.

The garden door slams open with my weight, and cold morning air hits me like a slap. Sharp. Biting. Real. The grass is wet under my feet as I stumble into the yard, almost falling twice before I make it to the oak tree. The same place Liam held me yesterday. The same place he whispered he loved me in the sun.

My knees buckle, and I drop to the ground hard, palms sinking into the damp earth. I can’t breathe. My chest locks up, tight and crushing, like iron clamps squeezing around my ribs. The world tilts sideways, the tree sways. My vision swims, darkening at the edges.

“No—no—no—”

The words don’t sound like mine. They scrape out of my throat, raw and shredded. Hugo whines, circling me in frantic loops before shoving his body against my side. He presses his head under my arm, trying to pull me back, grounding me, anchoring me, because he knows, I swear to God he knows.

“L—” My tongue won’t work. My jaw shakes. My throat closes. “L—Liam—” The sound breaks apart before it finishes. Hugo paws at my thigh, huffing, whining, nudging me harder, trying to pull me out of the terrifying blankness flooding through my head. But I’m sinking deeper.

“Why? Why would you... Why—”

“Wrenley!” Max’s voice tears through the fog as he sprints across the yard. He falls to his knees behind me, hands on my shoulders, turning me toward him.

“Sparrow, look at me—look at me, baby, breathe—”

I can’t. I can’t breathe. I choke on air that won’t go in.

“Sparrow—hey—hey—” He cups my face, thumbs on my cheeks, his voice trembling but strong. “Breathe for me. In—out—come on—”

My body convulses with the effort. My breath shudders and breaks. My throat feels like it’s closing. He pulls me into his chest, hands firm on my back, rocking me slightly like he’s trying to remind my body how to be alive.

“It’s okay—I’ve got you—I’ve got you—you’re safe—you’re safe—”

But I’m not. Not without Liam. Not when he left. Not when he said goodbye like he knew he wouldn’t—

“Why—” It tears out of me, raw and broken. “Why did you do that?”

My voice cracks, rising, and splintering. “What did you do?”

“You don’t get to do that–” I choke, shaking my head like I can undo it. “You don’t get to just leave—”

My hands claw at nothing, reaching for someone who isn’t there. “You can’t leave us!” I scream, the words ripping out of my chest. “You don’t get to decide that!”

Max tightens his hold, pulling me closer as I thrash against him. “I know. I know, Sparrow. I know.”

“No—you don’t—” I sob, my voice breaking apart. “He promised—he said—he—” The words collapse into nothing, into gasping, shaking breaths.

“You said always—” I choke. “You don’t get to break that!”

Hugo presses in closer, whining into my lap. Then heavy footsteps beat across the grass. Torque.

He skids to a stop, eyes wide when he sees the state I’m in.

“Fuck, Max—”

“Help me,” Max breathes, trying to keep my thrashing contained. Torque drops beside me instantly, his huge hands steady as he frames my face, forcing my eyes to his.

“Wrenley.” His voice is low, firm, and commanding. “Look at me.”

My eyes flick wildly, finally landing on his. “That’s it.” He murmurs, leaning closer. “Stay right here with me. You’re here. You’re safe. We’re right here.”

My chest spasms. A sob tears out of me so violently it feels like it shreds my ribcage. Torque pulls me against him, Max still behind me, the two of them holding me upright as Hugo shoves his head under my arm again, whining desperately.