Page 50 of Frat Ghost Wingman

“I’m glad I paid attention to what you were wearing.”

“So you were watching me?” I asked.

“Honestly? I haven’t taken my eyes off of you since, you know. I’m still a little-”

“Flattered?”

Zach smiled. “Surprised.” He continued, “I didn’t think you were attracted to guys.” He glanced around to make sure no one had heard.

“I don’t mind other people knowing. I’m not hiding this.” I reached across the table to grab his fingers, stroking them gently. “And to be honest with you, I don’t think I’m attracted to guys. I’m attracted to you.”

“You’re not attracted to guys? I don’t understand.”

“Well, I’m not gonna go around and get naked with everyone to see if I am. I know I’m attracted to you. Isn’t that enough?”

The server brought our drinks and took our food order.

Zach took a sip of his ginger beer, then asked, “But what about the porn? Weren’t you attracted to those guys?”

“I was imagining we were doing that.”

“Oh.”

“Have you accepted the defense of my gay dissertation yet?” I said with a smile.

Zach met my gaze. “It’s just…I’ve liked you for so long, this doesn’t seem real.”

“Just liked me, or liked me liked me?” I was thankful that my teasing brought a smile to his face, so I continued, “We’ve known each other our whole lives, Zach. There’s no one I’m closer with or have shared more secrets with. Now we just share something else.”

“It’s just that simple?”

“It is for me.”

“And you’re sure Jake didn’t somehow make you feel this way?”

“I thought about that on the drive over here, and I think this was what he was trying to do all along. He talked about you quite a bit. I think he was trying to get me to notice what a good couple we would make. But I don’t really know for sure, so we can ask him if you want?”

“Okay.”

“But it’s not going to change anything. I want to be with you.”

“Like a boyfriend?”

“Yes! Of course, like a boyfriend!”

“Well, you hadn’t said that yet and we kind of started with a blowjob-”

“It was like five seconds, Zach. I‘m not professionally gay, but I don’t think that really counts as a blowjob, and what do you mean we started with a blowjob, we started nineteen years ago!”

The server arrived with our food and I hoped to God she hadn’t heard the part about blowjobs. Once the server left, Zach continued, “So you are gay?”

I shrugged, sticking my fork into a plump rangoon. “It’s the easiest label for now. I know I’m attracted to you and that’s what matters to me in this moment.”

“You’re right, you know. I’ve always been attracted to you. I knew in the sixth grade that my feelings for you were more than friendship.”

I didn’t know why I hadn’t seen it sooner. “But you never told me.”

“What was I gonna do, Teo? Say, ‘Hey, we’ve been best friends forever. By the way, I have a huge crush on you. Let’s make out.’?” He took another sip and continued, “When should I have said that? The homework sessions? The vacations? The sleepovers?”