Page 56 of Bombshell

I flush, trying to decide if I’m reading into her comments. I can’t help thinking that Aja knows what I’m hiding.

“I better check on the others. Get to know him,” Aja says before leaving the stall.

I press my forehead to Raina’s muzzle. “No funny business, okay?”

He huffs, stomping a back hoof like he doesn’t appreciate being told what to do.

“I know,” I whisper, “but it’s not about me. Let’s just trust each other.”

Raina blinks, his round black eyes staring eerily back at mine before his head bows. I would almost swear he understands the request. I spend the next half hour, saddling him and double checking the straps before wandering to stall three to prep Cyrus’s ride. I snort when I see the name placard next to the door.

Princess.

Of course, Poppy named her horse princess. I can only imagine how Cyrus will feel about this development. Before I’ve finished saddling the mare, my friends appear, decked out in riding clothes.

“Oh, I should have told you to pack breeches,” Poppy says when she sees my leggings. “I think I have a spare set.”

“I’m fine,” I say quickly.

“We missed you at breakfast,” Cyrus says casually.

I search his face for guilt or anger or annoyance—any of the emotions I might expect to find after I rebuffed his advances last night, but all I find is the same old Cyrus Eaton. That’s a relief. I don’t want to be the one to break my best friend’s heart, especially since I suspect Cyrus had no idea what he was doing last night.

“I wasn’t hungry, so I came to check the stables.”

“Going to ride this one?” he asks me.

“Oh, no,” Poppy says. “Princess couldn’t keep up with Adair.” She looks quizzically at the saddle I’d buckled on her.

“Aja suggested she’s a good fit for Cyrus.”

There’s a heavy pause followed by a burst of hysterical laughter from Poppy. I can’t help but join her. Cyrus glares at us with a bemused smile.

“If you’re done, maybe we could get a move on,” he suggests.

“Sorry,” Poppy says, brushing a bit of hay off his shoulder. “We didn’t mean to laugh.”

“Sure about that?” he asks.

I have to duck out of the stall to stop myself from falling apart again. There’s something delicious about watching Cyrus knocked down a peg or two, even if he didn’t know what he was doing last night. Maybe it’s due to the fact that I’ve watched most of the men in my life strut around with puffed chests, bragging about their accomplishments and acting invincible. It’s refreshing to see one of them being reminded that he’s only human.

In the end, Cyrus accepts riding Princess with dignity, and Poppy chooses a handsome stallion named Gemini. We set off along the rolling hills of the Landry estate at an even pace that Cyrus can easily match.

Raina doesn’t resist me, but I sense how much I’m holding him back. He’s a powerful animal and I can only imagine what it would be like to ride him without restraint. I can’t help hoping someday that I will.

The countryside is beautiful. Even half a world away, I feel at home on Raina’s back. Thanks to Poppy and Cyrus the ride is smooth enough that I don’t feel nauseous once.

When we pause at a poplar grove, Cyrus stops Princess and dismounts her awkwardly.

“I need to take a leak,” he announces as he hands me the reins and disappears into the trees.

“Charming,” I mutter.

“Next time, we’ll go out alone,” Poppy says with a laugh.

When will that be? Lately, I try not to look too far into the future. It feels wrong to hope for a time when life might be normal again. Even worse than that, sometimes I’m scared that it won’t be. I’m scared my life will never be my own. I take a deep breath, reminding myself that I have this moment and the air in my lungs and a beautiful view. I have so much to be grateful for, and I just have to trust the rest will work itself out in its own time. My stomach rumbles as if reminding me that I can’t avoid thinking about the future altogether, especially when it comes to my next meal.

“I almost wish we’d brought a picnic,” I admit.