Page 19 of Hard to Love

He stares at our hands and then responds, “No. Never again, at least not until One kills me.” Dragging him to the kitchen, I hand him the water. Then I stop by the laundry room where I still have One’s clothes from last week. I walk him into my bedroom.

“One’s basketball shorts and t-shirt. You change while I go to the bathroom.” I had forgotten what I was wearing when he got here. I slip off my robe, sliding on some shorts and a tee. Hardy’s lying on the bed when I return. A smile spreads across his face; it’s perfect. I lay beside him.

“Thayer, I’m trying to be the man you deserve, but damn, woman. What the fuck do you have on?” His eyes traveling my body makes me feel so sexy.

“Boy shorts.” His eyes snap back to mine.

“Boy shorts? Hun, no boy could do for those shorts what your ass does for them. Fuck, this is going to be a helluva dating trial.” Hauling me to his side, I tuck in next to his chest. Thankfully, he left the shirt off.

Hardy reaches down, grabs me by the knee, pulling my leg across him. I’m seriously comfortable. I melt into him happily. Just before I feel his thick cock laying against his stomach—fuck, he’s hung—I squeeze my thighs to dissipate the need in my core.

“Hun, you’ve got to calm down. I’m trying to do the right thing here.” Leaning in, he kisses my head.

We fall asleep with him holding me.

Chapter Eleven

Hardy

Lying next to her, all I can think about is my adoration for her. She’s strong and loving. Taking my drunk ass in last night was more than she should have ever done. Why would she do that? Most women would’ve sent me packing, not Thayer. She may well be a better person than One if that’s possible.

One, now there’s another problem. He is not going to approve of this at all. He may be my best friend, but even he doesn’t know everything about me. I’m not sure if our friendship will withstand it either. Although I’m not sure about a lot lately, I know I need to be honest with Thayer. About everything.

I just can’t do it today, not like this. I need time to decide how to tell her, what to say to her. Do I tell her everything? Yes, of course. What if it freaks her out, and she says she can’t do it or doesn’t want to be with me? Either way, I run the risk of losing her. Now the question is, will I be okay if I do? I’ve got to get out of here until I can figure this out.

Sneaking out of bed, I grab my clothes on my way out. They’re One’s clothes; I’ll just sneak them back to him. Besides, Lulu’s home alone, and I’m sure she has needs. Cranking my truck, I pull away from Thayer’s place. Determined to figure this clusterfuck out.

She’s all I think about on the ride home. How to tell her all that needs saying, hoping she’ll understand. I never dreamed a person as good as Thayer would want me. I’ve hated who I am for most of my life; only in the last few years has it changed, and it’s because of One. I’m so afraid I’m going to lose him.

Turning down my drive, I’m surprised to see a truck waiting by my house. Fuck, what does he want? There’s only one reason he would be here, and as always, it can’t be good. He’s the exact reason I’m worried about Thayer; he’ll make it a living hell for her. Cutting off my ride, I slip from the seat, turning to stare at my uninvited guest.

“Brother, how are you? Been a long fucking time.” Never offering to shake my hand or a pat on the back.

“Eric, how are you? It’s been quite some time.” Standing my ground, I cross my arms over my chest. Eric looks the place over, including me, as he talks.

“Looking good, man, looks like you’ve bulked up more. I see you just about got that car ready to roll. Sweet.” Leaning against my truck, he looks out over the ocean.

My house was a fixer-upper. I got it for nothing with One’s help. My first home since I was seven; it’s all I’ve ever wanted. That and Thayer. Having Eric show up is rattling my resolve of telling her everything. Getting her involved may not be the best idea.

“Yeah, she’s about there. So what brings you around?” Eric side-eyes me, and I brace myself; shit can’t be good.

“You got something going on, man? You in a hurry? Cause, I let Lulu out, seein’ how you’re just getting home.” He’s been in my fucking house, goddamn it. He’s robbed me blind, I’m sure. “Security alarm is cheap, might want to fix that.”

“What the fuck are you doing? You can’t go in my home, Eric,” I say, adjusting my stance because I’m tired of this shit.

“Chill, dude. Besides, what are you going to do about it? Call your Richie-rich friend? Oh, wait. You’re going to call that nice piece of ass you carried home a few weeks ago, aren’t you? Did you really think you could come all the way down to Clemson chasin’ ass and me not find out?” I drop my arms to my side. I’m going to say my peace and tell him to leave. Or I’m going to beat his fucking ass.

“Don’t. You have no clue. You need to watch your mouth. You’ve broken into my home; you’ve insulted someone you should leave alone. Now, if there’s a problem, tell me. If not, you need to go.” I flex my hands as I finish.

“Calm down now; I was just good family, taking care of the dog and all. And since when do I need a reason to visit family? I didn’t know you wouldn’t be home. Did you stay the night with her?”

“You usually have a reason to visit.” I’m over this shit. No way will I discuss Thayer with him.

“Well, I’ll be around. I’ll think about telling you some time, maybe next visit.” Eric turns to walk away, throwing his hand up when he climbs in his beat-up Ford. “See ya soon, bro.”

Son of a bitch. I’m never going to getaway. How many more times can I fuck things up? I can’t tell Thayer all of this shit; she’ll never forgive me. She’ll think I’m a monster. When I was younger, I was not who I am now, but how can I explain that to her? Even if I do, I’m not going to bring all of this shit into her life.

Slamming my front door, I fire up my laptop to get my security system upgraded. I’m hoping when One finds out what I’m about to do to his sister, he’ll not fire my ass. If it comes down to it, I’ll tell him. Once he knows, One will be fine with me walking away again. No way will One want his sister in the middle of this shit storm.