Page 124 of Saints & Sailors

Scott clutched his phone and sighed. He pushed his free hand through his hair and peered down at the table. “Saylor… You’re expelled.” He looked up at me. “And if you’re found guilty, you’re facing up to ten years, and a fine that can be as much as twenty thousand dollars.”

This was serious. I knew it when I saw the evidence in my locker, but hearing it from Scott only cemented the severity of the situation.

This wasn’t getting pulled over with a joint. This was a trafficking charge in a school-zone at that.

“Scott…” I didn’t know what to say. He looked and sounded disappointed.

Without waiting any longer, he opened his phone and dialed my mother on speaker.

She answered at once. “Scott? I just got your text. What’s going on? Is Saylor okay?” She sounded anxious, and I hated to have to cause her any more stress.

Scott closed his eyes. “She’s been arrested, Maddie.”

“What?” Her shock was tangible, causing the hairs on my neck to stand up. “What happened?”

“They did a routine drug search at the school and they found over three pounds of weed in her locker. It was all bagged up like she was intending to sell it,” Scott explained, his voice tired and defeated. “She’s been expelled, and they’re talking about serious time for this. She won’t be able to go before the judge for a couple of days.”

The silence that met that last statement was deafening.

“I don’t understand. She was doing so good.” Her voice cracked and my heart tore in two.

I covered my face as my shoulders shook and tears ran down my cheeks. I’d been doing so well, and here I had hurt her all over again. It wasn’t even my fault, but trouble seemed to follow me wherever I went.

“I know, Maddie, I know,” Scott spoke softly into the phone. Then he looked up, finding me, holding my stare. “She says she didn’t do it. The deck’s stacked against her, but…I don’t know. I don’t see why she’d lie.”

My mother was crying on her end and I could take no more.

I stood from the chair, going over to the door and knocking on it loud enough to be heard.

My mother was broken and Scott was skeptical. Even when I was innocent, I was still a fuckup who caused nothing but pain. I had never sunk so low.

Rick brought me back to my cell. I went and lay down on the thin mattress, facing the wall and curling myself into a ball. Doing my best and failing to cease to exist.

hour thirty-two

There was nothing to do but think. Cut off from the world, all I could do as I lay in my cell, was stare at the ceiling and think over my life. Think about every selfish and reckless choice I’d ever made. And how it all landed me here in Meadow Grove.

I thought things were better. I thought I was doing good.

Yet here I was.

Down the hall I heard the security door open and footsteps descend toward me. I sat up and braced myself. Briefly, I wondered if it were time for dinner. Lunch at the precinct was a bologna sandwich, an apple, and a hard-boiled egg. Dinner the previous evening had been a piece of bread, corn, lettuce, and a weird mixture of beef and rice.

I hadn’t eaten in almost two days.

Rick came into view as he stopped at my cell door with a set of keys. “You’ve just gotten a lucky break.”

Was I going home? Did they realize I was innocent?

I licked my dry lips and stood up. “Am I free to go?”

Rick appeared grim, averting his gaze. “No, your lawyer’s here.”

I was confused as I felt my forehead crease. “My lawyer?”

Mom. She must’ve shelled out for an attorney. Anything to give me a fighting chance.

The thought depressed me. Now I was really costing her.