Page 39 of Heart of the Desert

I turned to see him pull a large flask from the inner pocket of his robe and brandish it in the air. The hyena’s head decoration on the stopper glimmered in the firelight, the shine of its eyes making it look like it was cackling.

“You brought laka?” Erix asked.

“Clan Tibel’s finest laka,” he explained. “I figured this journey would supply us with either a cause for celebration or a reason to drown our sorrows. I’m pleased it was the former.”

“I will not be partaking,” Aderyn said, holding her hands up palm out.

“More for the rest of us,” Dhara quipped, grabbing the flask from Elion and taking a hearty swig. I didn’t miss the way Elion’s gaze softened as he watched her wipe her mouth with the back of her hand as she passed the flask around to Erix.

Erix didn’t drink either, passing the flask to me. I quirked my head at him, and he shrugged. The gesture was casual, but the image of the wounds on his arm—clearly self-inflicted—flashed in my mind. A pang of hurt flickered through me, and I lifted the flask to my lips and took a healthy swallow.

He had hidden how badly his madness affected him from me. I guessed that was why he didn’t want to risk the alcohol. It was why he had turned to inflicting pain in secret to banish the visions. I did not begrudge him the relief—only that he did not give me the opportunity to offer him my own reprieve with my touch. He was the other half of my soul, and when he shied away, I was pulled in two. His pain was mine, but I could not feel it for him when he hid it.

The laka burned my throat and warmed my belly as I reached past Aderyn to hand it back to Elion. The warmth was almost enough to keep some of the unsettledness in my belly at bay. Maybe a few more swallows and it would dissipate like the heat rolling off the sand in the chill of the night.

Meanwhile, it only amplified the heat of Erix’s gaze on me as we passed the flask around the fire and enjoyed a brief moment of celebration in the quiet of the wilderness. Perhaps we could find our way back to each other once more. It was still not too late to offer my touch in place of pain and shield him from the demons that plagued him.

“We need more fuel for the fire,” Erix observed, pushing to his feet and dusting his hands off on his pants.

We had sat around the blaze sharing stories later into the night than might be strictly advisable, given that we needed to continue making good time tomorrow. Still, it had been pleasant, and now Dhara and Elion drifted closer together by the second as Aderyn’s eyelids drooped with exhaustion.

“I’ll come with you,” I volunteered and stood as well.

Erix nodded and we headed out in the direction of a patch of boulders dotted with scrub that we could collect for the fire. From the sidelong glances he stole at me and the tension shivering in our tether, I knew his mind had drifted to the same place mine had.

Ever since we reunited in the caves, I had been wanting to get him alone—to run my hands over every inch of his skin so I could catalog and care for every injury I would find there. Calm him with my touch and convince him to turn away from his path of self-destruction. I needed to feel every inch of him around me—inside me—to assure myself that this madness would not take him from me.

I would not let it.

As eager as I was, though, Erix’s desire was even more urgent, hitting me with the force of a galloping horse as we rounded a large patch of rocks and were hidden from the camp.

My back slammed into the boulder as Erix pushed into my space, devouring my mouth with single-minded intensity. I moaned and he swallowed the sound down, using the opportunity to swipe his tongue into my mouth. His fingers at the back of my head were firm and insistent, tangling in the curls at the nape of my neck and tipping my face back.

My own hands tangled in his curls, tugging to a point that I was sure flirted with the edge of pain, but it only seemed to spur him on.

“Sands, I need you,” he murmured against my lips, warm breath feathering across my face adding to the heat already building in my cheeks. “The moment that rock came down between us, I wanted to rip the tunnels down to get you back.”

“I knew I’d find you again—” I cut off with a breathy gasp as he bit down on the tendon in my neck, hard enough to jolt me from the languid haze working its way through my blood… although it wasn’t unpleasant. “I promised you we’d face all our challenges together, and I’d sooner die than break my promises.”

Erix growled, the rumbling in his chest pressed so close to mine, teasing my nipples until they rubbed harshly against my tunic. I squirmed into the sensation, wanting more. His fingers at my neck and hip tightened though, pinning me in place.

“I don’t want to hear you and death mentioned in the same sentence—” He paused, resting his forehead against my collarbone, panting. His whole body trembled against me, as if he were quivering with the effort it took to stay still. It reminded me of how he had been when I first touched him—when I removed his mask and traced my fingers feather-light over skin nobody had caressed in a decade.

“It’s too much, Keera,” he admitted in a hiss. “The way I need you—crave you so much it hurts. If I wasn’t already mad, it would be driving me to the edge and beyond. I need… everything.”

A shiver ran through my body at his words. They felt almost like a challenge—one I was eager to face.

“Take what you need. I’m not going anywhere.”

He groaned as his lips crashed into mine once again. He kissed me like a man possessed, all tongue and teeth and breathy moans. He molded his body to mine so tightly it was if the cracks between us would melt away, and we would fuse into one shining whole.

Still, it wasn’t close enough for him. His hands tightened on my ass, before he picked me up and spun me away from the rock face to lay me on the ground. The stars above me swam like lightning flies in my vision as the heat of his mouth traced across my collarbone. He tore my tunic over my head, grunting in frustration as it forced him to pull back from my skin for just a second.

I pawed at his own clothing, but he did not help me remove it, far too intent on sucking marks into the valley between my breasts. Finally, though, I managed to free him of his own tunic and tabards with fingers that shook from the intensity of my need.

Even as my skin lit with his touch, white-hot desire poured down the tether in my belly, blurring the lines of reality. It was no wonder he could scarcely contain it. Even the fraction of it that I experienced had me trembling uncontrollably.

Erix’s teeth scraped across my abdomen as he tore my pants down my legs, and I gasped.