Page 11 of A Highland Family Affair

She took his hand. ‘That sounds like a plan,’ she replied.

The following morning was a Friday and Olivia woke to find Brodie’s side of the bed empty. A quick glance at her phone told her it was just past eight in the morning. He was no doubt out with the dogs in the castle grounds before the gate opened to the public at ten. She stretched and stepped out of bed to make her way across the wide oak-planked floor of the large room to the window. She flung open the curtains and gazed out at the view. Off in the distance she could see a small herd of deer, antlers bobbing as they munched at the chestnuts and berries that had fallen to the ground. It was a view she cherished and used to enjoy sharing with her mother.

The Victorian addition of floor-to-ceiling windows and balconies to some bedrooms had made the castle appear more like a stately home these days, it was only when she turned and surveyed the interior of her room that it was still evident it was a castle. The stone had been left exposed on two walls, although, treated to eradicate the damp many years ago, it wasn’t as cold as it would have been when her ancestors had lived here. The mahogany-framed bed with its intricate and ornate carvings was another relic of the past, only this time it was the Georgian era. Little metal escutcheons towards the bottom of the bed showed where, with the correct key, the frame could be dismantled in order for the owner to take it with them when they travelled; a fact that Olivia still found hilarious. Talk about taking everything but the kitchen sink.

The other two walls had been panelled with mahogany but in the mid-to-late 2000s, teenage Olivia had horrified her parents when they had returned from a trip overseas to find that she had painted the panelling in a sunny yellow. She had been watching reruns of Changing Rooms with Bella and her granny and had come up with the crazy idea to decorate her room as a surprise for her mum and dad. Suffice it to say surprise was an understatement.

The Georgian mahogany, she discovered a little too late, had been imported by her ancestors from the Caribbean. She justified her actions later, however, when she found that many such plantations used enslaved people to do their dirty work, they were treated so badly in most situations and this extra discovery made Olivia sick to her stomach, so she figured her painting the mahogany was one in the eye for the so-called money-grabbing slave masters.

These days it was painted a more subtle shade of cream from the Farrow & Ball chart. Still sacrilege according to design guru Bella, who favoured the idea of stripping the wood back to its natural state. But this room now belonged to her and Brodie and they had briefly discussed making it more to their joint tastes, although they hadn’t quite got any further than a couple of paint samples being bought and some framed artwork that had yet to be hung.

Olivia made her bed, showered and dressed in black yoga pants and a long-sleeved pink top and made her way down to the kitchen. Mirren had Fridays off these days so she and Dougie would no doubt have plans that didn’t involve the castle.

She made a fresh pot of coffee and stood at the kitchen window overlooking the castle grounds. The window had been knocked in as part of an update in the Victorian era and was totally out of keeping with the castle but, in spite of its ugliness, Olivia liked the fact that she could watch the birds through the glass and see the sky-reaching oak trees swaying in the breeze. The sky looked heavy as if perhaps snow was on the way, and this made butterflies set about dancing in her stomach. The castle was already a picture-postcard vista in its own right, but there was something magical about the stonework being dusted with a white glistening covering of snow.

‘Ahem.’ Kerr cleared his throat as he entered the room. ‘Is there any more coffee, sis?’

Olivia turned to face him. He was wearing a pair of his old pyjamas that were now far too big on his slender frame. He’d had to draw them in at the waist. Sir Lancelot was standing dutifully beside his adopted master, gazing up at him, his fringe now neatly cut after a trip to the vets and groomers.

Olivia smiled and nodded. ‘Sure is. I’ve only just made it, help yourself. There’s some home-made bread if you fancy some toast too.’

He clapped his hands once and rubbed them together. ‘Do I ever?’ Once he had poured his coffee and buttered his toast he sat at the battered old table. After every couple of mouthfuls, he handed a piece to Sir Lancelot, who gently took the food, to Olivia’s surprise. Considering she had guessed he hadn’t been fed overly regularly, she expected a little more greed and aggression. The dog had clearly been trained well.

Olivia sat opposite him. ‘I think we need to talk,’ she said.

He placed down his toast and nodded. He swallowed his mouthful and replied, ‘If it’s about last night, I’m so, so sorry. I didn’t think. I feel terrible and I’m sure Brodie isn’t too pleased with me, but I can assure you it won’t happen again.’

Olivia sighed and placed down her mug. ‘It’s not just that, Kerr. I think… I think you and I need to talk about you and the real reason you’re here. Why you’ve had this massive change of heart. And how we move forward as siblings. I also think we maybe need to have some ground rules if you’re going to stay here for any length of time.’

‘Oh… I see. I presume Brodie has asked you to speak to me.’

Olivia crumpled her brow. ‘No. I’m my own person, Kerr. And this castle is my responsibility. This business is my responsibility. I have to know that you’re not here to sabotage things again. I know you’ve said that’s not the case, but I have to be able to believe you.’

He lowered his head. ‘And you don’t.’

She shook her head. ‘Can you blame me?’

He lifted his chin. ‘Not at all. I’ve said that before, haven’t I? I know I have to earn your trust again. And I know that won’t happen overnight, but I’d love for you to give me a chance. I’ll do anything. Give me a job to do. Let me help out, earn my keep so to speak.’

Her nostrils flared. ‘You were given a job, albeit not by me, for the fashion show, remember? You were supposedly in charge of the guest-list invites, thanks to Bella being far too trusting. You didn’t send out a single one. You purposely tried to ruin everything, Kerr, so, forgive me if I’m not rushing to find things for you to do around the castle.’

He held up his hands. ‘I know and I berate myself every day for what I did. It was childish, selfish and stupid. And I’m truly sorry.’

There was a long pause before Olivia asked, ‘Why did you do it, Kerr? I still don’t understand.’

He rubbed his hands over his face and back through his messy hair. ‘I was angry. I’ve always been angry, I think. You were always allowed to go off and do your own thing whilst, as the original heir to this place, I was expected to toe the line. Mum and Dad always seemed to be praising you. “Our wonderful Olivia has achieved this grade” or “Olivia is so creative and so good at…” whatever the hell it was. I felt excluded. Like I wasn’t as important as you. Or as good as you. So, I think I started to live up to that. And then when Mum changed her will and you inherited Drumblair I lost it. I couldn’t see straight. I was jealous and filled with this rage that I couldn’t aim anywhere. I’d spent my whole life gearing up to take over the place, it was all I knew. I’d been to university and gained a first-class degree that I’ve never even used because it wasn’t really necessary. I’ve never had anything to call my own and this place was going to be that for me. Or so I thought. And then you and Brodie found each other, and I was still trying to figure out what the hell love even felt like.’ He shook his head. ‘Nothing felt fair.’

‘But before the will reading you were talking about selling bits off, so it wouldn’t have been yours anyway,’ Olivia said with a scrunch of her brow.

He stared at the food on his plate. ‘That was the drink and gambling addictions talking. I would’ve come to my senses.’ He scowled and shook his head. ‘It’s irrelevant anyway now. But… I blamed you for everything.’

Olivia’s eyes were wide, and her heart was thumping at her ribs on hearing Kerr’s truth for the first time. ‘And now?’

His eyebrows gathered inwards, and his shoulders slumped. ‘I have so many regrets, Liv. I put gambling and drinking before Mum so it’s obvious to me now why she made the decisions she did. But at the time I couldn’t accept it. In my warped mind it was my right and you stole that from me, so I continued to put everything and anything before my relationship with you. But in doing so I lost everything worth living for.’ He shrugged and tears spilled over onto his cheeks, but he made no effort to wipe them away. ‘The truth is, I’ve never really loved anyone or allowed myself to feel loved. I think I saw it as a sign of weakness. Bloody macho pride. But I know now that’s not the case. I know that crying and showing love aren’t signs of weakness. They’re strengths. And I know you always loved me, and Mum and Dad too, and even Adaira and Bella. But because I eventually loathed myself, I couldn’t accept that love, couldn’t understand it. I detested who I’d become. I was this stereotypical evil brother like a character from a book or a movie. A caricature. Looking back, I can see that I let my anger eat away at me and turn me into this twisted, poor excuse of a human being.’ He swiped the moisture from his face with his sleeve. ‘I’ve wasted so much time. I just wish I could go back and change things, but I can’t. So, all I can do is look forward and change from here.’

Olivia reached across the table and took his hand. ‘Thank you for being honest with me.’

He placed his other hand on top of hers. ‘It’s the least I can do, Olivia. After the way I’ve treated everyone, especially you.’