Page 75 of It Was Always You

‘Mamá, please… We’re just not meant to be.’

Lenora smiled. ‘You know, when I met your father, I thought the same. There I was, a Spanish waitress working hard to get money for my family and in walked the most handsome man I had ever seen. He looked older, but I was so taken by him.’ Her eyes became glassy. ‘I was the only one who could speak English and my English was not so good, but I went over to the group of young men and could hardly speak when he looked at me. I was with another boy at the time. I thought I loved him. But the way I felt the first time I saw your father, Lily, words cannot describe it. I just… knew. The way you know about Adam. My parents were so angry. They forbid me to come to Scotland, but I love him so much I do it anyway. And I never look back, Mija. I never regret a day.’ Her voice wavered and a tear escaped. She quickly wiped it away. ‘I fear that you will never fall in love with another until you know how Adam feels about you. This is why I say you should tell him. You should never have regrets, Lily… never.’

Tears cascaded down Lily’s face as she listened to her mother talk about her father. She understood fully what her mother was saying but still she felt trapped by her own feelings.

‘I can’t risk losing him from my life. If I told him, he could wind up feeling awkward around me. I couldn’t bear that. He’s the most important man in my life with Papá gone. I… I love him so much that I’m prepared to watch him fall in love again just so that I keep him in my life. If he’s happy then I’ll be happy. If I lost him, Mamá—’ A sob escaped her throat and her mother leapt to her feet.

Coming around the table, Lenora wrapped her arms around Lily. ‘Please don’t cry, darling, I do understand. Really I do. I just wish things could be different. Maybe if I speak⁠—’

Lily gasped and widened her eyes. ‘No! No, please don’t say anything… please. I need you to promise me that you’ll keep this secret safe for me… please.’ She gripped her mother’s arms as she pleaded.

Lenora cupped her cheek and nodded. ‘Okay… okay. I will say nothing, but please promise me if you get the slightest feeling that he feels something, you will tell him, sí?’

‘Mamá, if ever things change, and I get the slightest inclination that he is in love with me… believe me… I will tell him. Just don’t go getting your hopes up, okay? It won’t happen.’ She kissed her mother’s cheek.

Her mother kissed Lily’s forehead. ‘I’m not so certain, Mija.’

TRACK 31

‘LONELY PUP IN A CHRISTMAS SHOP’ (ADAM FAITH)

December 2024

‘I’ve got it!’ Lily exclaimed as she and Adam sat in their favourite coffee shop in Jedburgh.

Adam pretended to get up. ‘Oh, shit, is it contagious because if it is I’m out of here.’

She pursed her lips and slapped his arm. ‘Oooh, aren’t we the funny one?’

‘Ouch! Oy! Okay, what have you got exactly?’ He was filled with trepidation. And there was no wonder considering the last great idea that Lily had ended with him registered – unbeknownst to him until later – on a dating website.

‘Instead of a woman, you need a pet!’ she announced with a dramatic flourish of her arms.

Adam laughed. ‘Are you having a giraffe?’

‘No… but you could! Well, not an actual giraffe obviously. Maybe something a bit smaller? A cat perhaps?’

He shook his head in disgust. ‘A cat? Seriously, Lil? I think you’ve had a temporary lapse in sanity. I’m allergic, remember?’

She scrunched her face. ‘Oh yeah, why do I keep forgetting that?’

He leaned towards her. ‘Erm, it’s obvious. Did you hear what I said about the temporary lapse in sanity?’ He leaned back again. ‘Although I’m beginning to think it’s not so temporary,’ he mumbled.

She narrowed her eyes and pointed at him. ‘You think you’re funny, Adders, but me and the rest of the world, we know differently.’ She gestured around them.

‘Gee, thanks… Anyway, I couldn’t have a cat even if I wasn’t allergic.’

She cocked her head to one side. ‘Oh yeah? Why’s that?’

His turn to roll his eyes. ‘Because I’m not a lonely old woman.’

She snorted. ‘Ha! You could’ve fooled me.’

‘Piss off.’

‘Honestly, Adders, you’re sometimes more like an old woman than any old woman I know.’

He shook his head and sneered. ‘Yeah… well… You’re… you… oh, just piss off.’