Page 246 of On His Team

Lucy is quiet beside me.

I look around my room, at my Camden sweatshirts, the chargers, and the bag open on the floor.

“This isn’t just about my brother anymore.”

That is the part that breaks me. I cover my mouth for a second and try to breathe through it.

“It was supposed to be his thing,” I say once I can talk again. “Camden was Benson’s. Hockey was Benson’s. Hawthorne was Benson’s house with Benson’s friends.”

Lucy’s grip tightens around my hand.

I swallow, feeling the first tear fall on my cheek. “And now I love all of them.”

My chest tightens, and my eyes fill with water, and it doesn’t stop. I laugh through the tears because I hate crying when I’m trying to explain something.

“I love Percy being weird and quiet. I love Stanley driving everybody insane. I love Blue pretending he doesn’t care about anything when he obviously does. I love Melly and Mara and Aspen and Penelope being there every weekend. I love you.”

Lucy’s eyes fill.

“And I love Rowan so much that it scares me.”

Lucy turns toward me fully.

I wipe another tear away. “So yeah. I’m freaking out because Benson has worked his entire life for this, and Rowan has worked his entire life for this, and somewhere along the way I stopped being the little sister who got dragged to hockey games.” My voice breaks. “This became mine too.”

Lucy’s face crumples a little. She pulls me into her. I go immediately. We sit there on the edge of my bed, holding onto each other while I cry into her shoulder.

“I know, G,” she says quietly. “I know.”

I pull back after a minute and wipe under my eyes. “This is embarrassing.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“I’m crying over a hockey tournament.”

“You’re crying because you love people.” Lucy smiles through her own tears.

“This is your team too,” she says. “Benson is your brother. Rowan is your person. These guys are our best friends. Hawthorne is basically our home. We’re all tied up in it now.”

I nod.

She squeezes my hand. “We’re a family.”

My vision blurs again.

I laugh and shake my head. “Yeah.”

Lucy smiles. “Yeah.”

I look down at the ridiculous amount of stuff on my bed. Then back at her. I exhale, “We’re going to Toledo.”

She nods. “We are.”

“They’re going to win,” I say with confidence.

“That’s the plan.”

I wipe my face with both hands and take a breath. “Okay.”