“No. Mama will keep you safe.”
Her hand trembled as she took the tattered picture and stuffed it inside her panties, but she knew better than to argue. Ivana had already moved onto the next stage of the plan, unfazed by what they were about to do.
“We’ll take the staff staircase down to the kitchen and leave through the pantry.”
Tamara clung to her sister’s words wide-eyed. She didn’t fully comprehend why they had to get away from the men in black, all she knew was the stories some of the older girls in the orphanage had told them about men who stuck things inside women and hurt them for fun. But she sensed that the matron knew the truth and had sold the twins anyway.
She just hadn’t expected her last night in the orphanage to come around so soon.
This wasn’t where she wanted to be. In her dreams, she and Ivana had a family, parents with smiles that lit up their faces, a bedroom with soft beds and pillows that didn’t crease their cheeks, and a garden where flowers in every color imaginable grew. Maybe even a dog with fluffy ears and a tail that wagged vigorously whenever it saw them.
The dream was a million miles away from their life in the orphanage.
But outside… The dream didn’t exist outside the building either.
“Ready?” Ivana’s eyes glittered, but she didn’t cast one final lingering look around the dorm room they shared with four other girls. She had already left the orphanage behind.
“Ready.” Tamara nodded.
Her pulse skittered as she followed Ivana downstairs on silent feet that knew the interior of the building better than they knew their own faces as they only got to look at their reflection once a week on bath day.
They saw no one on the stairs. Tamara couldn’t smell the men in black, and part of her hoped that they’d changed their minds and left already, or that she and Ivana had read their intentions wrong, confuddled by the grim stories told by the older girls. But her gut felt as though pill bugs had taken up residence inside her, and she knew that there was no turning back.
Whatever happened, there would be no turning back.
They were sneaking past the janitor’s room when the door opened, and the janitor stood there, peering out with bloodshot eyes while scratching his crotch.
Tamara froze, and Ivana pulled her back against the wall, covering her with one arm as if that might make her invisible. She watched, heart thudding, as the scuffed toes of his boots inched over the threshold of his room and into the corridor where he would surely see them. Then, she watched them disappear again, and the door close behind him.
“This way.” Ivana was already moving.
They scurried along the corridor. Past the kitchen where the smell of boiling potatoes caused Tamara to puff up her cheeks and hold her breath, past the laundry room, past the room that housed the big metal bath where they lined up on Sundays to wash in water that was already filthy by the time the younger kids got a turn.
The pantry was dark and cool when they slipped inside and closed the door gently behind them. Tamara breathed again, imprinting the aroma of soil clinging to food grown in the backyard onto her consciousness. They were almost there. All they had to do was cross the grounds, climb over the wall, and navigate the drop on the other side.
There’d been no opportunity for a practice run.
They didn’t even know what was directly behind the wall.
But this was it. They left now and chose their own fate, or they stayed and let others choose for them.
Ivana crossed the pantry and tested the door that led outside. It opened easily, and Tamara felt the kiss of cold air on her bare legs above her socks as she joined her sister.
It was early afternoon. The sky was heavy with dark-gray clouds that seemed to be resting on the treetops, gathering their strength before unleashing the rain upon the world. Tamara shivered as the first raindrop hit the ground at their feet. At least it would offer some camouflage in their dull gray skirts and sweaters.
Ivana squeezed her hand one last time and gestured at the wall beyond the trees lining the perimeter. “Run!”
They darted into the rain, meeting it head-on as they ran faster than they’d ever run before. Tamara felt as though she was racing her heartbeat, uncertain who would win. She kept her gaze focused on the trees straight ahead, trying not to glance at her sister as Ivana overtook her, her long black braid pelting her back with each effortless stride.
She was so focused that she didn’t notice the man in black appear from nowhere.
She heard him though, heard his footsteps pounding across the wet grass towards them, saw another man appear behind him. And then another. They were everywhere, like the pill bugs in her stomach, crawling out of the building and placing themselves between the two girls and freedom as though they’d been expecting them to try to escape.
“Faster!” Ivana veered right to put some distance between them and the men. “We’ll lose them in the trees.”
But Tamara’s legs were shaking, and although she tried to keep up with her sister, she could see her getting away. Tears mingled with the cold rain and stung her eyes. Not because she thought that Ivana would leave her behind, but because she knew that she was slowing her down.
She willed her legs to pump faster. Willed her heart to stop being angry and help her catch up to Ivana. But the men were getting closer, and a sob erupted deep inside, getting trapped inside her throat and making it hard to breathe.