Page 26 of Home Ice

“How much did he tell you?”

As easy as it is to underestimate Kasen and try to protect him, I remember being that age and hating having adults get in my way. I wanted to be treated like an adult, even though I had no clue what it was I was asking for, so I shoot for the balance between what’s in my role as his coach and what he wants. “He told me enough to think that you should talk to him.”

“Tried that. It sucked. Next.”

“I’m assuming he’s the in you were talking about when you mentioned hockey. If that’s the case, don’t you think you should at least let him try before you go using him?”

“He owes it to me after abandoning me my whole life.”

Fuck, it’s hard to bite my tongue. “At the end of the day, it’s your choice, and it’s not my business. All I’m going to say is that the Hawke I knew could be taken at his word, and now I’m going to point out we’re here to train, and we should get back to that.”

Kasen side-eyes me. “That’s your not-so-subtle way of telling me that I should talk to him again.”

“See? I knew they called you smart for a reason. Now, stretch. We’re going to work on those lateral movements you struggled with at the end of last season.”

“I told you, I fell over and bruised my hip. It’s fine now.”

“Well, we’re about to see.” I nod at him to get to it, and through the lesson, he manages not to bring up Hawke again. I can sense the curiosity in the glances he keeps throwing my way, but we get on to practicing saves, and he forgets about it.

I fake out like I’m aiming for the five-hole, then send a solid shot at the top corner, glove side. He almost falls for it, but at the last second, he gets his hand up and snatches the puck before it passes him.

“Hell yes,” he shouts, flicking the puck into the air. “Did you see that? I am the damn master at this.”

It’s one of those uncanny moments of similarity. The number of times that I watched Hawke showboat after scoring or saving a shot is reflected in Kasen’s fist pump.

“I’m telling you,” he says. “This season is going to be next-level. I’m ready.”

I really hope so, because the team’s been struggling for a decent goalie for years.

A slow clap echoes through the near-empty building, and we both look over at the same time. Hawke’s leaning against the barrier, next to the entrance he was standing at earlier, and there’s a huge grin across his face.

“I thought Barrett had you there,” he says, voice echoing across to us.

I glance at Kasen to follow his lead. The excitement has drained out of him, and he’s glaring out from behind his cage. “What’s he doing here?”

“Maybe he wanted to see you play.”

Kasen’s obviously put together that I told Hawke he’d be here, but he doesn’t call me on it. “Doesn’t matter,” he says with a shake of his head. “We’re training. Let’s go.”

I don’t look at Hawke as we get back into it. The tension is high the whole time. I can feel Hawke’s stare on us, and I can feel the way Kasen’s trying to pretend he can’t. There’s no reason for me to get involved, but while I know in this position that I’m a coach first, part of me is still wanting to make things up to Hawke. Every time I open my mouth to give my opinion, I promptly close it again.

Kasen and I get through everything I wanted to show him, and when he takes his helmet off and pours water into his mouth, his back is turned on Hawke.

“How do you want to play this?” I ask him. “Need me to run interference or …”

His eyes darken, and he shoots a look toward the stands. “You know he had no clue what to say to me yesterday? No ‘this whole thing sucks.’ No ‘I’m sorry I wasn’t there for you.’ No questions about me, no interest. He walked around looking like he was struck by lightning. Ignoring my existence doesn’t mean I’ll suddenly disappear.”

“It’s not your job to make him comfortable with the situation.”

“Good, because I won’t be.”

It’s so, so fucking hard not to say more than that.

Kasen must recognize it because he rolls his eyes. “Just say it.”

“Maybe he’s not the villain here. It sounds like he fucked up yesterday, but he’s here, trying again. Doesn’t that count for something?”

Kasen grunts. “We’ll see.” He goes to skate toward Hawke, but pauses. “That was code for you’re coming with me and not leaving me alone with the guy. He’s a stranger. What kind of coach are you?”