Page 50 of Home Ice

“Fuck no.” I don’t deny the jealousy though. I should. Because it’s not like I wanted to fuck Barrett during college. That was more of a high school thing. And, okay, maybe there were a few times in college I almost suggested we fool around for fun, and yes, my dick is blindingly hard right now.

But that doesn’t mean I’m jealous.

Just … sort of hate that Barrett felt comfortable enough to go through that with Trevor and not me.

“How did that get started, anyway?” I ask, like I can’t help myself. Someone—probably the beer—has taken over my mouth and isn’t slowing down. “He put on a little show in the shower for you? Offer to massage away the aches from a game.”

Barrett’s eyes narrow teasingly, setting off a flurry in my gut. “This isn’t a low-budget porn film we’re talking about.”

“What, then?” My tone is short, probably because I don’t actually want him to tell me, but I’m going to keep pushing for it anyway. Because again. My mouth.

“You really want to know?”

“Yes.” No.

“We were at a party. I overheard him on the phone to his mom in one of the bedrooms. Apparently, she wasn’t happy about him planning to come out. When they hung up, I figured I’d go and comfort him, and we got to talking. He told me everything. So I figured it was my chance to act on what I thought I’d been feeling.”

I jump as Barrett sets his hand midway up my thigh.

“I touched him here,” Barrett murmurs, gaze still locked on mine. “Told him I knew how he was feeling.”

His hand inches higher, and it takes everything in me to stay still. To stop my eyes from rolling back.

“That I was here for him if he needed it.”

“And?” The word barely makes it past my teeth.

“And he got on his knees and sucked my cock.”

My own cock throbs.

With startling clarity, I know exactly what party it was too. Or at least, one of the parties they hooked up at. I was looking for him to do shots with me when the both of them walked out of a bedroom. I thought nothing of it, but Barrett had been in the best mood all night.

Because of fucking Trevor.

I push away from the table. “I’m getting us more drinks.”

Instead of heading for the bar though, I take the back exit that loops around to the small parking lot. The door complains as I shoulder through it and out into the cooler night air. At first, I glare at the sky, unsure why it’s night, then I realize hours must have passed.

Hours. With Barrett.

That’s how easy it still is with him.

Or at least, that’s how I’ve always felt.

Apparently, he doesn’t think the same.

If he did, I would have been the one he came out to. I would have been the one to suck his cock.

It’s not a question in my mind. While I might not have been in love with him or anything like that, the idea of getting to spend college having sex with him would have blown my fucking mind.

How much easier would it have been to share a room with the guy you’re fucking instead of faking a stomach flu for your roommate?

But no. Fucking Trevor got all that.

The back door creaks open, and I know it’s him without looking.

“You ready to go home?”