Page 91 of Meet Me in Ivy Falls

‘I can’t pretend everything is fine. There are too many memories here,’ I said. ‘With you. With the house. By coming back to Ivy Falls, buying the house for Piper, I opened Pandora’s fucking box and it almost cost my little sister her life.’ My voice shook and it took all my strength to stay upright. ‘She’s all I have left in this world,’ I whispered.

‘You’re wrong.’ Torran’s warm, beautiful fingers slid along my chin and forced me to look in her direction. ‘You have me and Pete and Diego. Hell, you have all of Ivy Falls who will support you if you agree to stay and put down roots.’ She pulled in a rough breath. ‘The day you outbid me on the house, you asked why I wanted it. I said it was to help the town. In part that was true, but I was also desperate not to lose my last link to you. Please, for the first time in your life, stop running and stay with me.’

I wanted so much to pull her into my arms. Let the sweet smell of her wash over me, but the reality of the last hours had sunk in. As long as I acted broken, she wouldn’t step away, so I did the only thing I could to make her leave.

‘I am not running. This isn’t about me anymore. And it certainly isn’t about you, Torran.’ My volume rose with each word. ‘Stop being so damn selfish and see what’s right in front of your eyes. I can’t be here for you. My sister needs me. She’s the only thing in my life that matters.’

The rawest kind of pain etched into the lines around her eyes and mouth and it almost brought me to my knees.

‘You can lie to yourself all you want, Beck, but you’re scared.’ Her voice trembled. ‘After my mother died, it would have been easy to go back to Phoenix. Hide from the memories of her. I didn’t realize it back then, but I wanted to be here to help Ivy Falls because it was the place she loved. The place that for better or worse knows me best.’

Torran closed the space between us. I should have known she wasn’t going to make this easy.

‘Forget about me. Forget about the house,’ she said, her voice barely a whisper. ‘But Ivy Falls is your home. People here know you. Care about you. They’d do everything in their power to help, but you’ve gone it alone for so long you can’t see that anymore.’

‘No,’ I spit out, taking a full step back. ‘Ivy Falls stopped being my home a long time ago. You’ll never get it, Tor. You haven’t been through what Piper and I have. Lost your parents in such a brutal way. Even now, if I close my eyes, I can still hear their screams.’

I gulped down the fear, anger and regret that crowded my already tight throat.

‘Those flames that took my parents also peeled away the layers of the person I used to be. Destroyed me beyond words. The Beck you knew before no longer exists.’ I placed that firm mask of indifference on my face. ‘It was a mistake to come back to Ivy Falls. For these last few months, I’ve kidded myself into thinking I could have a normal life with you. But this episode with Piper, it’s taught me that will never happen. It’s always been the two of us, and I won’t let anyone else stand in the way.’

The tense set of her shoulders returned. ‘You begged me to be a part of your life. Said this felt like a second chance. Was that all bullshit?’

I did the one thing she hated; I shrugged like none of this mattered. That she didn’t matter. Just the small movement sent a sharp and excruciating pain through me, but I knew it would bring back that armor I’d tried so hard these last months to peel away.

‘You are a quitter and a liar, Beck Townsend!’ Her shrill voice bounced against the pale walls, making more than one nurse glance in our direction. ‘What you told me that night you first showed me your scars, those were promises you never intended on keeping. One sign of trouble and you shut down. It’s like with that fake picture you took years ago with that girl. You’d rather lie and hide from the people who care about you than deal with the struggle of facing your own fears. That’s a sad and shitty way to live your life.’

Deputy Ben appeared at the end of the hall. His eyes darted between me and Torran as he approached. ‘My apologies for interrupting but I need to speak to Miss Townsend if she’s awake.’

Torran stared at me for one long moment like I was nothing and it cut all the way to my soul.

‘It’s fine, Ben. Beck and I are done.’ She spun on her heel and stalked toward the elevator.

I closed my eyes, unable to watch her walk out of my life for good this time.

Chapter Forty-Two

TORRAN

Grief Is An Unpredictable Animal.

Four days later the house still resembled a disaster zone. Deep blue paint soaked into the once beautiful dark caramel stain coating the floors. Hammer gouges took out large swaths of drywall. It was hard to stare at it all and not be physically ill.

Manny and I had managed to hold off Lauren as long as possible, but when she walked inside an hour ago all the color drained from her rouged cheeks.

‘How quickly do you think you can fix it?’ Lauren said, tapping the pointed toe of her bright red stiletto.

‘It’s going to take at least two to three weeks for labor and another two for new appliances to be ordered and installed,’ Manny replied. ‘But we can get it done. Think that will still work with the production schedule?’

Once again, Manny was saving us. I could barely form coherent sentences because I’d slept about five hours in the last few days. Every time I closed my eyes, my argument with Beck in the hospital replayed in my head. What he was going through with Piper was heartbreaking. I wanted to do everything right, comfort him in the way he needed, but I couldn’t. All of it was too reminiscent of what had happened ten years ago. Back then he hadn’t given me a choice, or let me support him, and it felt like the same thing was happening all over again.

Lauren swept a dark curl from her eyes and checked her phone. ‘Let me make a call and see what I can do.’ The grim set of her lips said we were screwed.

‘They’re never going to give us the time,’ I said.

Manny sank down next to me on the stairs. ‘Don’t give up. If they want the show, they’ll work with us.’

I couldn’t help the caustic laugh that burst from my lips. ‘There’s no way we can fix this house in five weeks, Manny. You know that. We don’t have a crew and the kitchen…’ I couldn’t finish the sentence. Couldn’t think about all the work I’d done to the beautiful cabinets which were mangled and hanging off their hinges now.