Page 129 of Keeping Score

It was almost tangible, the feeling of peace and calm that existed here. There wasn’t room for uncertainty or fear. Only the love the three of them had for each other.

I’d pushed Brody away for so long because he had wanted exactly this.

Was this everything I’d been scared of? I thought suddenly.

But then I thought, no. This was exactly what I was scared of losing. And the part of my brain that had led all my decisions the last few years had somehow convinced me that it was better to never have it at all than to have it and lose it.

Now, I wasn’t so sure.

I shook my head, distracting myself from thoughts that wouldn’t serve me. Right now, I just needed to work my way through Mr. Reilly’s case and go from there. That was all I had the energy for at the moment.

But a night of Moana wouldn’t hurt to take the edge off.

Cassie and Lily’s feet poked out from under their blanket, and I laughed at the colorful fuzzy socks they both wore. I panned my gaze to Liam’s, noting the stark difference in his generic Nike socks.

“What? No matching pajamas?” I joked.

“Oh, we have them.” Liam widened his eyes as he nodded.

“But Liam hates wearing them,” Cassie pouted.

“I do not,” he said, staring down at her. “They’re just a little… tight.”

Cassie scoffed. I giggled, raising my brows at him, as if to say, really? Matching jammies?

“Let’s just say Cassie and Lily look a hell of a lot cuter in them than I can pull off.”

“I believe that,” I said with a laugh.

“Shhhh,” Lily said finally, never tearing her gaze off the screen. “Too loud.”

“Oh, I’m sorry, missy.” Cassie poked her. “Are we interrupting your movie?”

“Yes, you are, Mommy. Movies are for listening, not for talking.”

“Ouch,” Cassie placed a hand atop her heart. “My own daughter using my own words against me.” Then Cassie turned to me in explanation. “It’s what I taught her before we went to the movie theater for the first time. I guess she really took it to heart.”

“Shhh,” Lily said again, and this time Cassie stared at her with a grin, miming a zipper coming across her lips.

The movie played for a while, and I’d gotten so into it that I hadn’t realized Lily had fallen asleep until Liam was standing up and scooping her in his arms.

“I’m going to put this one to bed,” he whispered. “I’ll be right back.”

Cassie and I watched Liam leave, carrying a sleeping Lily out of the living room, leaving us alone in the flickering light.

“So,” I said, twisting my body so I could look over at her on the other side of the couch, “have you seen Brody at all today?”

“No,” Cassie admitted. “I don’t think he’s been around today.”

“But where would he go?” I asked, heart breaking at the thought that I might have driven him away.

We were his friends. His family here. Where else could he be but with us? Nowhere that made any sense.

“I honestly don’t know,” Cassie shrugged. “Liam didn’t offer up any details, and I didn’t really want to pry into it. I’ve sort of just been trying to stay out of everyone’s way as much as I can while you work through this.”

I laughed. “We’re in your house and you’re trying to stay out of our way?” I shook my head with a smile. “Typical Cassie. I bet all this disharmony is killing you.”

“So much.” She agreed with a wince. “I just want you guys to be happy, and I know you won’t be until everything is right between you.”