Page 172 of Where Roads Lead

He dropped his head again.

“Look at you, you’re here begging for a girl back that you never even loved. And for what? To make your parents happy? What about you, Andrew? I know you must have some spark of passion inside that rigid, tightly wound exterior of yours.”

“I could love you,” he said quietly. “I could try.”

“You shouldn’t have to try, Andrew.” I laughed softly. “And you shouldn’t have to agonize over not being able to feel something that you just don’t.”

But he turned, scowling at my words.

“You think we should just follow our whims, do whatever we want, whenever we want. No regard for the people around us, or how it looks from the outside. Look where it got you, alone in some town, no job, financially cut off, with not even a next step lined up for your life.”

I recoiled.

“What are you even doing here, Elspeth? Is this really the life you want to be living?”

“I don’t know what I want yet. But I do know that I only want to be living it for me, and not anyone else.”

He laughed humorlessly.

“And if it doesn’t work out?”

“Then that’s the beauty of choice, Andrew. I can always try again.”

“So, that’s it then? You’re turning your back on it all?”

“Why does it have to be one or the other? Why can’t I get a job I like, marry a man I choose, and still have my family?”

“They’ll see it as a betrayal, and you know it.”

“Maybe I see it as a betrayal that they can’t find it in their heart to support their only daughter trying to find some shred of happiness for the first time in her life.”

He stared at me for a long time, as if he thought I might take it back. Promise to go back to Boston with him. Reschedule the wedding. Do it all over again, just for the sake of not getting into trouble with our parents.

When I didn’t, he shook his head sadly, as if the last of his energy was finally depleted.

“I hope one day you learn to grow up, Elspeth.” He stood up and headed for the door. “If not for your family’s sake, then for your own.”

I stared at him, trying to find some worthy parting line. Some plea I might make that could make him see things differently. To force him not to give up on his own life so easily.

But we simply existed on two entirely different planes of existence. We always had. And I knew now, there was nothing either of us could say to change the other. No matter how badly we wanted to.

“You can’t live in your bubble forever,” he said over his shoulder. “Eventually, it’s going to pop.”

He left me there in the dark silence of the house, wallowing in the splash of reality he’d doused me with.

It was true. I’d always been a dreamer. But I hadn’t thought it was a bad thing before now.

I thought other people weren’t brave enough to follow their dreams the way I always wanted to, but maybe they were the brave ones for facing a life where they may not be following their heart, but at least they had money to pay their bills.

I knew what I wanted, that part was easy. But I didn’t know what to do.

So, I did the only thing I could.

I picked up my pen and I wrote.

Chapter Fifty-One

Will