Page 40 of A Thread of Breath and Bone

She leaves me there, her long turquoise train carving a path through the damp sand. The pain in my chest flares again, but the spike of agony is tempered by a single thought:

Tonight, I’ll be with her.

Chapter 16

Raea

My arms ache with another clash of our swords, and I realize with satisfaction that the guard Professor Ainslyn and Ezra have selected for me to train with today is actually struggling. We rebound, me taking a moment to circle him and catch my breath. Channeling my grief is the only way to keep from being consumed by it. Every clash of steel is a scream I’m not allowed to let out.

I found myself wandering the grounds earlier this morning and ended up at Kuron’s rooms. I nearly buckled when I found another Regil coming out of them. The sight of a new Regil exiting his quarters didn't just hurt; it felt like a betrayal of his memory. Of course, she had no idea. When she saw me, she bowed and took off for her shift.

Add that to the pain of missing Ryker—physically and spiritually—and starting my cycle today…well, I’ve been one big ball of emotions. And we don’t need my emotions. We are preparing for war.

I grunt as I bring the sword down on him, making him stumble. For minutes, there’s only the back and forth, the clang of metal on metal, and my own heartbeat threatening to jump out of my chest.

“Enough!” Ezra barks from the sideline, but I don’t stop, and when the guard realizes I’m not going to, he jumps aside, unsure if he should defend himself or not. His forfeit only adds to my growing irritation, my anger. It’s the only thing holding back all the other emotions I can’t show.

I’m the godsdamn princess, and I cannot be weak.

“Fight me!” I scream through my blurry eyes.

He glances at Ezra once before he brings his sword up to meet mine. I don’t have time for coddling. I need to prepare. I need to push myself. I need to be who everyone says that I am.

The air around me shatters, ripples of iridescent light washing over the training pit before I hear his voice. Relief hits me so hard my knees wobble.

The guard swings for my stomach, forcing me to jump back again.

Then he’s there.

“Mind if I step in?” Ryker asks the guard.

I stumble toward him, relief and happiness flooding me all at once. His dark hair is windswept and perfectly tousled by his hands. The dark navy of his trousers brings out the sapphire of his eyes. He’s wearing a crisp black top, the sleeves rolled up to his elbows, revealing the octopus tattoo winding down his left arm.

I’m nearly to him when he brings a sword between us, holding me back.

“Miss me?” he croons.

The words in my mind have fled, and all I can think is how badly I want to feel his mouth on mine. He swings the sword around, testing the weight, uncaring that his polished shoes are sinking further into the dirty sand.

“How?” It’s all that tumbles from my mouth.

Eloquent.

Gods, he always makes me tongue-tied.

There are still days when I’m not sure he’s even really mine, because how could he be? He looks perfect, and I’m a blood-stained, grief-stricken wreck. I’ve never wanted to crawl to someone more than I do right now.

“Soraea, love, why are you out here? It’s nearly dinner, and I do believe Ezra said stop.”

There’s a sparkle to his eye as he says it, and I realize he’s distracting me. He knows exactly why I’m out here. Besides, why shouldn’t I be? It’s better than wandering the halls waiting for something to happen.

Professor Ainslyn has been here two days already and has kept me busy in the training rings between meetings. He’s supposed to be helping me learn to control my magic.

I feel like I’ve been locked away in the palace with nothing to do other than eat, sleep, train, and sit with my thoughts. And those thoughts have been too dark as of late.

Last night I dreamed of her again. The version of me with the silvery hair and black painted eyes. It was harmless, but it was taunting, images of her appearing on the edges with a snake-like smile.

Ryker steps around me, sword raised between us.