Page 26 of Librarian & the Rockstar

"I need to get back to work," I say regretfully, tilting my head back to look up at him.

He sighs, scanning my face. "Do you still want me to come to dinner tonight?"

"Yes." I bite my lip. "Unless you don't want to?"

"Oh, I want to, Loralei." He rests his forehead against mine. "I want it enough that it should scare the shit out of me."

"Does it?"

He hesitates for a moment, and a tiny sliver of my heart breaks from the rest. "Not as much as it should," he finally admits.

I'm not entirely sure what that means, but I think I can guess. He didn't come here looking for this anymore than I went out to the canyon looking for him. Neither of us expected to meet the other or to feel the way we do. And yet…here we are anyway.

What are we supposed to do about that? Eventually, he has to go back to his real life. And his real life isn't sex with a small-town librarian in the basement. It's not a cabin in the middle of nowhere. It's sold-out shows, an endless barrage of media attention, publicity, and commitments. Does he even have a place in it for me?

I don't know, but I think I want him to. It's selfish and wrong, but I want him to want me to belong in his life, even if it's a pipe dream.

But it's never that simple, is it?

A chill rips through me, the sudden certainty that he's going to break my heart. Maybe not today or tomorrow, but some day soon, he's going to rip it right out of my chest. Whether he means to do it or not, he will.

I think maybe that's the only way this can end.

"I should go," I say, stepping out of the circle of his arms.

He catches my fingers at the last second, his gaze somber. "See you tonight?"

For a split second, I hesitate, wondering if this is the part where I'm supposed to protect myself and my heart. If this is where I'm supposed to step back and put up walls, build a buffer to mitigate the damage I can already see coming my way. And then I see the hopeful, pleading look on his face…and I think maybe it's already too late for that.

So I do the only thing I know how to do. I nod.

Chapter Nine

Ash

Loralei's place is a cute little bungalow at the end of a cul-de-sac, with massive rosebushes growing beneath the windows and pink shutters. Inside, one entire wall is dominated by floor-to-ceiling bookshelves. Her furniture is gently worn, the color scheme soft and inviting.

"Dinner is almost finished," she says, leading me into a small kitchen overlooking the backyard. My stomach growls as soon as I step over the threshold and catch the mouthwatering hint of garlic butter in the air.

"What can I do to help?"

"Mm. Set the table?" she calls over her table, her hips swaying as she hurries to the stove to deal with a bubbling pot. "I just need to finish the noodles."

"Spaghetti?" I ask hopefully.

"I hope you don't mind," she says, almost like she expects me to be offended. "I didn't have a lot of time."

"Loralei." I wait until she meets my gaze. "You worked all day, spent time helping out at the bookstore, and still made time to cook for me," I murmur. "Believe me, baby, I'm grateful."

A tiny, pleased smile twists at her lips.

"Where can I find plates?"

She points me in the right direction, and I get to work. "Have you lived here long?" I ask, laying out silverware beside our plates.

"Not really. My grandma left the house to me when she passed a couple of years ago."

I pause, startled. "It was your grandma's house?"