Page 156 of Demons Dig Donuts

“So, there is an immortal dove just flying around the woods out there?”

“Yes.”

“And… she never came back?”

“No.” Mr. Heiss shook his head. “It felt wrong to try trapping her again. So, I leave food. There’s always clean water. And we simply go about our lives apart from one another. Whatever it is she wants, it’s not me.”

“Did you ever try getting her another dove?”

“A what?” Mr. Heiss stared.

“Another dove. Maybe that’s why she left. She was just, you know, looking for her own version of the Light. But in dove form.” Indy shrugged. “We all want somewhere to belong. To have a companion, a friend, or whatever. We want that connection. That’s pretty much what the Light is, or at least that’s what it sounds like. You tried to find it in Ethan, but he sucked ass. So, then you had Miss Alabaster. Maybe she was happy with you for a while, but what she needed was, like, a bird connection. And that’s what she’s trying to find.”

“I suppose.” Mr. Heiss frowned.

“I bet if you find her a cute little dove boyfriend, you’ll see her again. Or a girlfriend. I dunno. One of each. Give her a bird harem.”

Mr. Heiss chuckled. “I’ll think about it.”

“Is this why…” Indy traced his thumb over the back of Mr. Heiss’s knuckles. “You hate humans? Because of Ethan?”

“While I never let anyone get that close to me again, Ethan was only the first of many humans who disappointed me. It’s easy to be angry when everyone you meet continues to prove you right.” Mr. Heiss glanced down at their joined hands. “I thought you were like that too.”

“What? Vapid, superficial, blah blah?”

“Yes. And I was wrong.” Mr. Heiss looked up to meet Indy’s eyes. “I once held an angel as my prisoner to harness both his power and to feel the Light again—”

“Yeah, I heard about that.”

“Oh, did you?”

“Yup. Heard there was a lot of weird sexy stuff.”

Mr. Heiss scoffed. “There was no weird sexy stuff.”

“But hey, wait, didn’t you find a way to make your own Light? With Miss Alabaster and all that? You know, by yourself?”

“Yes, but there was always a part of me that still longed for the true Light. I think all fallen crave it even if we never want to admit it. I imagine it’s a punishment. Feeling that void that can never be filled. It’s probably something built into us to make us suffer for being cast out. But…”

“But?”

“What I had before and even what I knew as an angel in the Light of the Celestial?” Mr. Heiss brought Indy’s hand up for a soft kiss. “They’re all nothing but mere shadows when compared to what I feel when I am with you.”

“I—” Indy couldn’t breathe, his heart pounding so hard it was sure to burst out through his eyeballs. The only thing grounding him was the grip of Mr. Heiss’s hand, and every little plan in his head to keep his secret, to hide the awful truth, was currently turning to mush inside his skull. “Look, I…”

“You’re annoying.” Mr. Heiss smirked, cocky even though his gaze glowed with warmth. “You’re materialistic and stubborn, hopelessly vain and arrogant. But you’re also kind, brave, and completely unflinching in the face of danger for the ones you love. You carry such a weight upon you, one you don’t want anyone to see, and instead of withering away as so many others would? You thrive upon it. You choose to live. You choose to fight. You challenge me. To be quite frank, you piss me off. But you make me laugh. You make me smile. And I have never enjoyed a single moment of time more than those I’ve spent with you.”

“Hey, okay, we need to… You…” Indy’s eyes burned and he had to keep blinking to hold back tears as his heart ached. “Look, goddammit, you can’t just say all this sweet, nice shit and, and just—” He growled and rubbed his face, his stomach congealing into concrete. “I am so glad, like, wow, so glad we had this talk, and, and you opened up? But I have to—”

“Indy,” Mr. Heiss said gently. “Breathe. Remember what that’s like? Breathing?”

“Fuck off,” Indy croaked, but he did try to take a few quick breaths to keep himself from hyperventilating. His chest tightened, and he grabbed it, cringing in pain. The room spun as the agony rose, and there was nothing he could do to stop it. He coughed violently, turning his head as he swallowed back a mouthful of blood.

“Indy?” Mr. Heiss was alarmed. “What’s wrong?”

“I…” Indy gulped again and again, trying to choke down the lump in his throat alongside the bitter taste of blood. He coughed, harder now, and he tried to cover his mouth and turn away. The blood splashed through his fingers, and there was no way to hide it this time.

Shit, shit, shit.