Page 102 of Read My Lips

I sat up sharply, squinting at him. “You were?”

Simon tugged me down, setting the smallest kiss to the very corner of my mouth. “Yes.”

“Bullshit,” I whispered. He’d have brought a change of clothes along with his portable bar if his to-do list featured sleepovers. But I’d take it. This time, the lie of it was all for me.

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Richard Whittaker Exposé

Simon

As discussed, draft document attached. I await your comments for inclusion.

Luke

This is Definitely a Horse

by L Cunningham

One night last week, I went home with a guy whose face is now very familiar on the internet, answering the question if #Dickydidn’tdoit, who did? He got an emergency call from work in the middle of our would-be hook up. The same night the first version of the much debated Horse Gate sex tapes hit.

He was the interpreter for the PR manager, who is the other man in the film #nakedPR, #eyesontheprize. And nothing in the way they interacted suggested they were anything other than employer and employee.

I didn’t get my night of fun, but although I didn’t realise it at the time, I got an insight into the depths people will go, to maintain and protect an outdated image of what an English Gentleman is supposed to look like, and how he is supposed to behave.

In my mind, there’s no doubt the first video was of Richard Whittaker. As I write this, there will be technical experts analysing both lots of footage on a micro-level, which might give a definitive answer, but that answer might leave us even more questions. Why were so many people so keen to rush in to cover this up? Why do so many people care?

Whittaker’s pregnant fiancée might have something to do with it. To mainstream Britain, the notion of cheating is terrible enough, but it’s unthinkable that a quintessential rugby-playing, beer-swilling lad like Whittaker might be dallying not with another woman, but with another man. Somehow, this transgression is viewed by the world’s media as worse than denying an individual’s right to privacy. Today, Whittaker’s sex life and orientation are on open season. And so are the two people who stepped forward to protect him with this patently transparent cover-up. The world is demanding the truth, and I believe it’s owed it.

Not because the media has a right to demand anyone discloses their sexuality, but because in this age of fake news, if we don’t call out the lies, how can we trust anything we are told at all? I don’t want to live in a society where the Richard Whittaker’s of the world carry on however they please behind closed doors, shifting reality around them so their outward face is never anything less than the traditionally acceptable norm. That norm is outdated. But nothing changes for anyone if they continue to behave like their ancestors before them, and we collectively contrive to let them.

Mapp and Green, the PR Agency representing Whittaker, have declined to comment beyond confirming they are investigating the misuse of clients’ homes for personal purposes. When I caught up with my failed one night stand, he declined an interview.

And I’m left wondering, what could possibly have convinced the interpreter of Whittaker’s PR manager to enter into this kind of cover up? Is the bigger story here laced with bribes and sexual coercion? And why is nobody asking those questions?

From: [email protected]

To: [email protected]

Re: Richard Whittaker Exposé

Dear Luke

Ben and I are willing to offer you an exclusive interview for the purposes of bringing your opinion piece into line with the facts of the situation.

Although you are a novice journalist, I am sure you are highly attuned to the irreparable damage a libel case can cause a journalistic career. We would love to support you in putting out the most accurate version of events surrounding the video erroneously purporting to include Richard Whittaker and myself.

We have a table booked at Possimus at 1pm tomorrow. Please arrive promptly.

Kind regards

Simon Azie

CHAPTER

TWENTY-EIGHT