Page 16 of Board Games and Broomsticks

Perhaps it was time to start letting her in.

‘It is, yes. I guess … it’s the first time I’ve felt like using it.’

‘That makes sense. You seemed so … lost when you first got here, and maybe now you’re finding yourself again, you’re reconnecting with your magic, too.’

Nyx bumped her head against Nyssa’s calf. It was the signal she always used when she wanted to be picked up, and Nyssa scooped her into her arms, grateful for the familiar comfort of her weight as she thought over Liora’s words. ‘Maybe you’re right. I … was lost when I got here. More than I even realized, I …’ She sucked in a deep breath through her nose. Pressed her cheek into Nyx’s fur. ‘I’m the one who messed up The Coven of the Sacred Owl’s warding ritual.’

Nyssa waited for Liora’s judgement, but the bard simply offered her an encouraging smile, silently saying: I’m here, I’m listening.

And perhaps it was that, or perhaps it was the exhaustion of holding on to the secret for so long, that led Nyssa to finally admit everything that had happened.

‘Everything was fine with my coven leadership up until a few months ago, when things started going wrong with my magic: small things at first, like enchantments doing the opposite of what I wove them for, or weather spells backfiring. I thought it was something I could fix with a good night’s sleep and more practice, but then, the night of the ritual, I …’ Nyssa’s throat tightened at the memory of Noah’s bulging eyes. ‘I hurt someone, and I put the entire coven at risk. So they suspended me. They didn’t say I had to leave the covenstead, but I couldn’t stay there after that, so I just started flying. I didn’t even realize I was heading for Nighthaven until I saw it in the distance.’

‘Oh, Nyssa,’ Liora said, ‘I’m so sorry.’

‘It’s my own fault. I let myself get burnt out, and I became a liability. Now, if I want to rejoin the coven, I have to prove myself by completing three trials, and I … I don’t know if I can.’ It was the first time Nyssa had admitted it out loud, and it took everything she had to keep the tears burning her eyes from escaping.

‘You can.’ Liora sounded more adamant than Nyssa had ever heard her. ‘Anyone would buckle under the weight of the kind of pressure you were dealing with. I don’t think it’s a coincidence you managed a successful enchantment now that you’re feeling more relaxed, do you?’

Nyssa wanted to believe she was right. That it was just a case of finding a balance between her emotional wellbeing and her magic, but one successful enchantment (and a minor one, at that) didn’t mean she’d be able to successfully perform the kind of high-level spells required of a head mage.

Still … it was a step in the right direction. And perhaps with Liora’s support, Nyssa would be able to take a few more.

‘Thanks, Li.’ She smiled. Regardless of whether Liora’s theory was right or not, it felt good to share her secret with someone who didn’t see her as the failure her coven did. Still … ‘I’d prefer it if you kept this to yourself for now. I’m just … not ready for everyone in Nighthaven to know yet.’

‘Oh, don’t worry, your secrets are safe with me – cross my heart, and all that!’ Liora glanced at the clock they’d hung above the serving counter. ‘I’ve got to head back to Swyn, but I’ll see you tomorrow!’ Liora pressed a kiss to Nyssa’s cheek, handed over her hot chocolate, and with one last appreciative look at the sparkling fairy lights, left Nyssa alone in the store.

Nyssa simply stood in the middle of the space, looking up at the enchanted fairy lights with the same wonder as if they were real stars. Perhaps Liora was right. This sense of peace, of contentment … She hadn’t felt it since her first few weeks as head mage. Maybe—

Creak.

Nyssa flinched and whirled towards the source of the sound, her magic instinctively pooling in her fingertips. It was a different kind of sensation to the one she’d felt when she’d had the urge to enchant something. Heavier in a way that made Nyssa apprehensive to wield it.

Thankfully, she didn’t have to. Elowen stepped out from the back room, her serene expression instantly calming Nyssa’s nerves. ‘Sorry, I came in through the back door because I forgot my bag.’ Elowen searched Nyssa’s face, eyes filled with a sympathy Nyssa felt she didn’t deserve.

‘You heard, didn’t you?’ Nyssa asked, her heart sinking. She didn’t want anyone in Nighthaven thinking of her as a failure, especially not the people who were quickly becoming her friends.

‘I won’t tell anyone,’ Elowen said. She kept her distance, hands clasped formally in front of her, but Nyssa couldn’t sense any sort of judgement from her. ‘I … know what it’s like to have a past you fear people will use to define you.’

Throat suddenly dry, Nyssa asked, ‘You do?’

‘Yes, I …’ Elowen took a deep breath. Looked down at the floor as if she was considering how much to share. So far, the elf had been particularly secretive about her private life, and so Nyssa wasn’t expecting it when she admitted, ‘I was also sent away by my people.’

The look on Elowen’s face made Nyssa want to take her into her arms and protect her from whatever memory was haunting her. Instead, she settled on to a spot on the floor, crossing her legs, and awkwardly patted the space next to her. Elowen’s lips twisted into a small smile. She crossed the shop in a few graceful strides and settled on to the ground beside Nyssa with a small, resigned sigh. Nyx immediately jumped into her lap, turned around three times, and plonked herself down with a happy purr.

‘It was a few years ago now,’ Elowen continued, absently stroking Nyx’s fur. ‘I’ve mostly come to terms with it, but sometimes … sometimes I find myself wondering what would happen if I returned. If my clan would still be angry with me for questioning their ways, or if they’d have found it in themselves to forgive me.’ She shook her head, and a strand of dark auburn hair fell over her eyes. ‘I know the answer, of course. It’s why I’m still here.’

This was the closest Nyssa had ever been to the elf, and she could make out the smattering of freckles against her warm skin. Could see the ring of gold around her green eyes. They were so beautiful it was almost painful to look at them, and Nyssa found herself trying to resist the urge to reach out and tuck her hair away from her face.

‘Your clan banished you just because you questioned their beliefs?’

‘Mm. In their eyes, that is reason enough,’ said Elowen. ‘You follow the path, or you leave. The only way they would take me back now is if I pledged myself to their ways once more and promised never to question their rules or the elven gods they believe in.’

Nyssa placed her hand over Elowen’s before she could think better of it. ‘That’s … awful. No one should be cast out for following their own path.’ Elowen looked down at their hands, and then back up at Nyssa. Her cheeks had turned a delightful shade of rouge. ‘For what it’s worth, I … I think you’re very brave.’

The smile that came over Elowen’s face made Nyssa’s stomach flip. ‘… And I do not think you are a failure.’

Nyssa’s heart was suddenly beating so loudly it was hard to hear anything over it. For some reason, all she could focus on were Elowen’s lips. The way they curled up at the edges. The way they parted slightly as the elf’s eyes roamed Nyssa’s face.