Page 65 of Rising Star

“When is Maddie going to come back?” Mikaella asked.

I shrugged. “No idea. But I have a plan. Let me just put it into motion to see if it could work. Do you trust me?”

She bobbed her head.

“Daddy, can we eat colton candy at the fair?” my baby girl asked. “Lots of colton candy.”

“You want lots of cotton candy? What about your teeth?”

She bobbed her head fast, her eyes sparkling. “Yes. I want a big, big colton candy. Pink. Maddie says it’s okay if we brush our teeth after.”

Her genuine delight healed a part of my heart, while the remembrance of the woman I loved cracked a layer.

Justine’s tiny hands wrapped around my neck, then she wriggled until I put her down on her feet. “Come on, Daddy. Don’t make us late.”

20

MADISON

“Ems, I’m not wearing that,” I said, pushing away the knitted dress she was handing me. “No way. I’m perfectly fine in my PJs.”

“No, it’s not. We’re going to get that cast removed, and then we’re celebrating, you and I.”

I shook my head a couple of times. “All good here. Not going anywhere. Forget it.”

“You need to get out of this house at some point.”

I folded my arms over my chest. “I don’t. I’m good. Just leave me alone, Ems.”

I clamped my teeth together as the lightning of agony spread through my left leg. A stabbing sensation so strong a wave of nausea hit me. Using both hands, I pressed on my cast, wishing I could rip it away.

Emily sat beside me. “Breathe.”

My jaw tightened, and water filled my eyes. “It’s like it’s getting worse each day.”

“Post-surgical neuropathic pain is real. But it’s a good sign. It can take a few months to resolve.” She touched my toes one by one, asking me questions. “I’m not worried. With the repair your leg went through, it’s all normal. With the supplements you’re taking and the daily physical therapy sessions you are doing to strengthen your muscles, especially of the other leg, it’ll help with the healing. And to relieve some of the nerve pain. You’re lucky Sam arranged twenty-four-seven in-house care for you. It makes the whole appointment thing so much easier since you don’t have to leave the place.” Her voice softened. “But I hear you, okay? Give it more time.”

“Time? Time?” I repeated. “It’s been over two months. My heart almost jumps out of my chest every time the pain hits. I wish they had cut my leg when given the choice. At least I wouldn’t have to endure the distress that comes with it being patched up.”

My sister’s eyes snapped to mine. “Maddie, you don’t mean it. You’re just hurting. Anyone in your situation would be.”

“Easy for you to say. It’s not your leg. Your body. Your life.”

“No, it’s not,” she said. “But I’ve seen enough cases similar to yours to know what it implies.”

I huffed, ire swirling in me at a dizzying speed. “Again, not you who’s glued to a bed all day.”

She pointed to the discarded wheelchair in the corner of the room. The one I refused to use. “Maddie, you are choosing to stay in your room. You are choosing to forget you have options. I agree they’re not the ones you would aim for usually. But you can do better than being angry at the world. Where’s the girl who survived neglect growing up? Or the one who always chased her dreams?”

“She’s dead. All I’m reduced to is a cripple who has no idea if one day she’ll get the use of her leg fully back because some idiot ran a red light. Why do I have to be the victim of his bad judgment?”

Emily shook her head. “Again, you’re the girl choosing to position herself as a victim. And it’s out of character for you.”

I looked away, refusing to acknowledge her words.

After a long beat, I spoke up. “Maybe I’m exhausted. Maybe it’s asking too much of me. What if I’m tired of always fighting for my life?”

My sister wound her arms around me. I steeled against her, but she didn’t let go, and I relaxed after a full minute.