Page 95 of Thaw My Heart

He gently asked again about my back, wanting to know why I didn’t like being touched between my shoulder blades. But I made up some lame excuse, avoiding the question by taking him in my throat. Like I’d been dreaming of doing for weeks, and I loved every second of it.

After that, he let the conversation go, playing with my hair while I slept on his chest, fully clothed. More intimate than I would’ve liked, but his touch was comforting. I’m starting to care for him much more than I had intended to.

In all the eight years I spent with my ex-husband, we’d never been so intimate.

I can’t remember a time that he’d held me while I slept, brushed the hair from my face, danced with me in the living room, and given me world-shattering orgasms. Because he barely touched me, and when he did…

I suck in a breath, holding myself in tight as a cold breeze blows through the snow-covered field, sending a shiver down my spine. Pushing away the bad memories. Today’s cattle drive started early, pulling me from Kit’s bed at an unreasonable hour, but at least there’s a bonfire to look forward to. Blake’s fortieth birthday party celebration. A perfect distraction that I need today.

With the twenty minutes I have to spare, I return home to freshen up for the party. Throwing on a pair of flare jeans, a lacy tank top that I think will drive Kit crazy, and a chunky sweater to match.

My phone buzzes in my pocket, lighting up a name that surprises me. “Jax,” I answer with a smile. “How are you?”

“Hey, Em. I’m good, but maybe not as good as you,” he laughs at the chipper tone in my voice. “Ranch life still going well?”

“Living the dream,” I throw on a clean pair of socks and check my calendar. “It hasn’t even been a month yet. You’re early.”

“Yeah, I had a minute to spare and… you know. Always worrying about you.”

“You have no reason to. This place is working out well for me.” Amongst other things. But telling him that I have a new man in my life will only set him on edge.

“I’m glad to hear that. I’ve got some time coming up for the holidays. I should be able to visit for Christmas.”

“Really?” Excitement shines in my voice. It’s been so long since I’ve seen my brother, it sounded like a dream.

“Am I still invited?” he asks.

“Of course you are! Gosh, I miss you so much, Jax. You’re going to love it here. I can’t wait to show you around, and maybe we could even go horse riding."

“You know I’m not good with horses.” Despite growing up on a small farm in Nebraska, he never quite understood horses. Or anything about ranch life.

“I can teach you how to ride, if you’ll finally let me."

“You can try,” he laughs.

“Gosh, it’s going to be so good to see you in person. I can’t remember the last time we—” My eyes snap to Kit, stepping into his bedroom where I’m sitting on his bed, taking me by surprise. “Hey, can I call you later?”

“You know how to reach me,” Jaxson says before hanging up.

I rise off the bed, tucking my phone in the back pocket of my jeans. “Hey,” I say, but something about Kit seems off… His eyes are dark, and the lines in his face look pained. “Are you alright?”

“I’m fine. The boys told me you went home. I came to offer you a ride,” he wavers in the entrance to his room, like he’s afraid to step closer.

Or maybe I’m just over-analyzing him.

“Oh, that’s sweet. Let me just throw on my shoes.”

We sit in silence during the seven-minute ride back to the main barn, listening to music on the radio. A Christmas song starts to play, and he curses, changing the station. It’s almost as if we’ve drifted back to the start. Like the past few days never happened.

When he puts his truck in park, I grab his hand. “Is something wrong? You’re… quiet.” For lack of a better word.

“I’m just tired.” I’d believe him, except his eyes don’t meet mine. “Also, Cole invited us to his place after the party, but you don’t have to if you⁠—”

“I’d love to.” I squeeze his hand in confirmation. After all, I enjoy being around Cole. He’s one of my childhood heroes.

“Maybe we can make a better impression this time,” I add with a wink.

He nods in response and exits the truck.