Page 70 of The Heart’s Charge

Jonah took a long moment to answer. “All men are scoundrels in one way or another. We make mistakes. Bad choices. Sometimes ones with . . . hefty consequences.”

That slight hesitation. Was he thinking of something specific? Something personal? Eliza’s chest squeezed.

“That Jep fella made plenty of mistakes,” Jonah continued. “One of ’em was so big, it cost his daughter her life. Yet God still used him to lead his people for another six years. I gotta think it’s because even though the man wasn’t perfect, he was still God’s man at heart and did his best to follow where the Almighty led. That’s all any of us can do.”

“Even you?”

“Especially me.” His voice rasped slightly. He fell silent, then cleared his throat before continuing. “Regrets are heavy, son. The fewer you cart around, the better off you’ll be. But when they come, and they will, remember you got a Father who will carry them for you if you let him.”

Eliza bit her lip, her heart melting. Maybe having a man around the place wasn’t such a bad idea after all. Although, the man she wanted hanging around wasn’t Katherine’s beau, but his reserved partner. The man with deadly aim, secret regrets, and the patience to tell a hurting boy healing stories.

“Now get on in the house,” Jonah said. “The young’uns are prob’ly lookin’ for you.”

“All right.”

The front door opened and closed. Eliza leapt from her chair and pressed her back against the wall near the curtain, hoping Abner wouldn’t notice her and realize she’d been listening to his private conversation. She needn’t have worried, though. He charged straight up the stairs without a glance into the parlor.

Letting out a breath, she stepped away from the wall and turned back to the window, intending to close it for the night.

“Tradin’ listening at doorways for listening at windows, now, are ya?”

Eliza gasped as Jonah stepped in front of the window and crouched down so she could see his face. He tipped his hat back on his head and aimed a sharp look her way, one that cut past her justifications and pierced a hole in her conscience.

“Why don’t you come on out here and have a real conversation instead of stealing ones that belong to other folks?”

CHAPTER

TWENTY-NINE

Jonah hadn’t known Eliza was there until the kid up and left and he caught movement at the parlor window. If he’d known, he never would’ve spoken in such crass terms. He’d done it to make a point, to help Abner understand that God loved all his children, no matter their origins. But to use such language in the hearing of a lady? His mama would’ve boxed his ears.

No telling what Miss Eliza thought of his character now. If he hadn’t fully offended her with his frank talk, he’d no doubt finished the job when he’d snapped at her through the window. This was why he usually kept his mouth shut. It saved him from having to chew boot leather.

Sticking his feet someplace other than his mouth, Jonah stomped down the wraparound porch to the steps. He’d best focus on the job he was here to do and quit worrying about impressing a woman a mile out of his league. Eliza Southerland was educated. Refined. And about as beautiful as they came. Fiercely independent too. Probably didn’t even want a man. At least not one like him. A Howard fella would suit her better. A man of letters. A scholar or maybe a minister. Not an ex-soldier with blood on his hands and sins on his soul.

“It’s not polite to invite a lady to a conversation, then storm off before she has a chance to accept.”

Jonah spun around. She stood in the doorway, eyes searching his, hands fiddling with the fabric of her skirt as if she were nervous. Or chastened.

Doggone it.

He strode back to the base of the stairs. “I had no call to say what I said.” He snatched his hat off his head and banged it against his thigh. “I’m sorry for growlin’ at you and for . . .” A few more thumps of the hat against his leg. “And for using inappropriate language in your hearing. I don’t normally talk about . . .”

Shut up, Brooks, before you make it worse. He slammed his teeth together, then dropped his lips as an extra layer of protection against any other ill-advised explanations that might try to escape the stockade.

Eliza pulled the door closed behind her and sauntered down the steps, stopping on the next-to-last one so she could look him straight in the eye. “You had every right to call me out. As soon as I realized the personal nature of the conversation, I should have left the parlor. But I didn’t.” She glanced away. “I am sorry for invading your and Abner’s privacy. However, I’m not sorry I heard what I did.”

Slowly, her face came around again, and her gaze met his. His gut clenched when he noticed the moisture glimmering in her large brown eyes. “Thank you.” She touched his arm, her fingers squeezing against his bicep. His heart rate doubled. “I think you might have done more to raise that boy’s opinion of himself with one candid conversation than Katherine and I have done with all of our mothering and instructing.”

Jonah shook his head. “It’s only because you’ve done such a good job makin’ the boy feel safe that he opened up at all.”

“Still, it was a conversation that needed to be had, and I doubt Abner would have brought it up to one of his female guardians.” She shrugged, a self-conscious smile turning up the edge of her mouth. “To be honest, if he had, I probably would’ve invested more energy in trying to correct his assumption and his language than in truly hearing him. You heard him.”

“Maybe that’s ’cause I know what it’s like to feel unworthy.” The words slinked past the gate of his lips before he could lasso them back into the pen where they belonged.

Stupid moonlight, glistening in Eliza’s eyes and turning them into glossy obsidian. It stripped a man of his defenses. Allowed hidden truths to sneak out into the open without his permission.

She circled around to his side and slid her hand into the crook of his elbow. She started walking across the yard between the house and the barn, forcing him to either pull away or take the hint and escort her on an evening stroll. Despite his exposing an unwanted thread she was sure to tug on, he slapped his hat on his head and stretched his legs into a stride that would match hers. He’d been trained for battle, after all, not cowardice. Besides, what man in his right mind wouldn’t take a moonlight stroll with a lady he admired? Even in territory littered with verbal snares sure to trip a man. He’d just have to tread carefully.