Page 32 of Hearts Lost

I nod at Aloserin, and his hand relaxes around my wrist. A heartbeat later he lets go; my skin feels hot where he touched me. Together, we watch the animal slide through the trees like smoke. It’s still scared of us and wary of this entire side of the river, which I strongly suspect is its preferred path to wherever it’s going. But it’s also hungry, and there’s more fruit on the other side.

The other side of what, though? I frown as the animal emerges from the trees and slips into the river. Its body spreads out like oil over water, and my awareness swells with a deep, almost erotic sense of pleasure. It likes to swim. They all like to swim.

The animal’s broad, smokey body ripples across the water, radiating contentment. It spreads across the churning foam at the base of the falling water, and I have the sense of bubbles rising against skin, nice, like scratching an itch. And then the animal is just— gone.

Aloserin exhales loudly beside me, then shakes his head.

“That’s four,” he says.

It takes me a moment to remember. Yes, he’s right. Four animals have disappeared into the waterfall since we arrived, and I can feel others hovering around the edge of the woods, waiting for us to have the common decency to disappear so they can do the same.

“Yes, it is,” I agree. And then, because there’s really only one thing to do here, I say the obvious. “You feel like swimming?”

Aloserin turns and looks at me like I’ve lost my stars-damned mind.

“Are you kidding?” he asks.

“Following the animals is the plan,” I say as I pull off the little pack I’ve made out of my cloak and stretch my arms. “Unless you have a better suggestion?”

Aloserin raises an eyebrow. It’s an expression that looks good on him. Unfortunately.

“Swim? Into that?” he says, with a nod to the swirling maelstrom at the base of the waterfall.

I scowl at him. Of course he’s not going to make this easy.

“No, I thought I’d just lie down on my back and swim back through the forest, you ass,” I snap. “Of course, we’re going to swim through that. We’re following the animals, remember?”

His lips twist like he’s trying to wrestle with his own smile.

“It’s suicide,” he says.

“That was your first plan, remember?” I reply. “We’re doomed, so let’s give up?”

He lifts his hand to cup his chin.

“If I remember correctly, suicide was your suggestion, not mine,” he says.

I huff and throw my hands into the air.

“Well, if the best the Kingdom of the Fall can come up with is we’re doomed, then I guess I can see how you all got trapped down here!” I snap.

Silence falls between us, as hard and pounding as the thunder of the waterfall. Shit. I’ve gone too far again, spoken my mind and lost my temper when I really should have kept my mouth shut.

“Sorry,” I stammer. “That was rude.”

But Aloserin is smiling through the net of his fingers.

“Let me guess,” he says. “You’re rather intimately familiar with your Royal Guard’s punishments for speaking out of turn?”

I turn to stare at my mud-splattered boots. His voice is light, almost teasing, like he’s making a joke. And he’s right. I am rather intimately familiar with every single one of my Royal Guard’s many punishments but now doesn’t seem the time to bring that up.

“Like I said,” I begin. “I never wanted to join the Royal Guard.”

Aloserin makes a noise like a purr in the back of his throat. I swallow hard around the growing lump in my throat. Aloserin said he had a choice. I still can’t quite bring myself to believe him, especially after what he said about having royal blood, but if there was ever a type of man who would actually choose the Royal Guard, it would be Aloserin. He’s thoughtful, methodical, and calm in a crisis.

I pull my gaze up from my own boots and find Aloserin frowning at the waterfall, his arms crossed over his chest. Something inside my chest does a strange little flip. He woke up in a world he’d been taught to hate and fear, next to a woman from the kingdom that imprisoned his people. And yet here he is, watching the waterfall. Listening to me. Taking me seriously.

My eyes sting and my chest aches. In another world, I think, I would like Aloserin.

I would like him very much.