Page 256 of Good Boys Don’t Bite

“You came to the bar.”

“Yes.”

Ronan stared. Elliot remembered the night. Ronan drunk enough to smile openly. Friends packed around a booth. Dylan had been there. Before anything between Elliot and Ronan had crossed the final boundary. Before Elliot knew Dylan had slept with him. Benjamin Cole had been dead less than three hours. Elliot had walked into the bar. Hugged Ronan. Bought him a drink. Smiled for photographs. Stayed until closing. Ronan whispered:

“You killed someone and then came to my birthday.”

“Yes.”

“Did you think about it?”

Elliot hesitated.

“Not much.”

Ronan turned away. The answer had hurt. Truth often did. Elliot stood.

“Ronan.”

“Don’t touch me.”

He stopped. Ronan stared at the wall. For several seconds, Elliot thought he might leave the room. He didn’t.

“I need you to understand something,” Ronan said.

“Okay.”

“I am here.”

Elliot’s chest tightened.

“But I don’t know why yet.”

He swallowed.

“Okay.”

“And me staying in this house tonight does not mean I’ve accepted this.”

“I know.”

Ronan turned.

“It doesn’t mean we’re okay.”

“I know.”

“It doesn’t mean I’m going to keep lying.”

That one hurt. Elliot nodded anyway.

“Okay.”

Ronan stared.

“You’re taking that too well.”

“What do you want me to do?”