Page 62 of You + Me – Against the World

Another jolt runs through my bones. My first instinct is to run and hide. But my legs no longer obey me. They are heavy and motionless, rooted to the ground, as if they have been swallowed up by quicksand. Only my racing heart reminds me that I’m alive. It’s the only part of me with even an ounce of strength left.

A figure emerges from the building’s entrance, and my pulse quickens again. I feel a tingling sensation all the way to my fingertips. Vadim has shaved his head. I don’t even recognize him. He crosses the street and comes straight toward me.

“What the hell are you doing here? Don’t you think you’ve caused enough problems?”

It’s like a slap in the face.

My brain finally catches up. My eyes widen, and I come back to my senses. It’s Felix. Felix Alonso, standing right in front of me, with his short hair and hard expression. I’ve never felt so disgusted. The feeling seems mutual, though. I’m on the verge of collapsing, but I pull myself together enough to interrogate him.

“Where’s Vadim?”

“None of your business. Get out of here.”

“Felix, please! Tell me!”

“Are you giving me orders now, Lancaster? Vadim might have fallen for your innocent little girl act, but it won’t work on me. Get out of my way!” he yells, taking another step in my direction.

“What are you talking about?” I wish I could control it, but my trembling voice betrays my fear.

“This is all your fault!” he spits in my face, before stepping around me.

I catch up with him and place a shaky hand on his arm.

“Felix, please! I’m going crazy! I’ve gone to all the police stations in the city trying to find him. I need to know! What did he do? Where is he?”

“This is the part where you start crying, is that it? You can whine all you want, Lancaster. It won’t help him get out of there. And I’ll never feel sorry for you.”

“But what can I do?”

“Nothing. You’ve done enough. Don’t do a single thing! You’re the reason he got caught. He’s not the same anymore. His mind is isn’t in the game; he’s not as careful. There’s no way this would have happened before!”

“Got caught? But for what?”

“None of your business. He has a record now, and you’re going to end up bringing him down. And me with him!”

“What? Is that why you’re living at his place?”

“Yes, are you happy? I’m in deep shit. I have nothing left if I don’t have Vadim!” Felix yells, his voice cracking.

“That makes two of us, then,” I whisper, letting my tears flow.

Felix lets out a long sigh, his body tense and his features twisted with rage,. He looks at me for a moment, turns away, runs a hand over his forehead, then presses his thumb and index finger into his eyes, as if he’s trying to stop himself from crying. Eventually, he pulls his hood over his buzzcut and faces me again.

“Go home, Lancaster. And leave him alone. Vadim was doing much better before you came on the scene. He had managed to get himself back on his feet. Don’t turn his whole life upside down. He’s suffered enough as it is.”

I watch Felix walk away, his big, white sneakers shuffling along the sidewalk resolutely. I’m lulled by the sound, as the quicksand closes around my feet and a powerful vice grips my heart.

My tear-filled eyes drift back to the apartment window. The light is out. The glimmer of hope is gone.

22

“So, how was your weekend?” Clémentine asks, grimacing at my haggard face when I arrive on campus.

“Meh.”

I force a smile for her anyway.

“Okay or terrible? Tell Auntie Clem everything.”