Page 2 of Good Intentions, Vol. 1

Chapter Two

Nick

“Daddy,” a little scream is all the heads-up I get before I’m hit in the knees by two little fists. “Daddy, daddy, daddy.” The little guy repeats over and over with no end to his happiness.

“Hey, buddy,” I coo softly, trying to get him to lower his voice by giving him an example. Kneeling, I fake curiosity and concern.

“I missed you, where have you been all day? I couldn’t find you,” I give him the words I tell him every day.

In his little mind, he’s convinced we are playing a game of hide and seek. I know he’ll soon be aware that we’re not, but for now it makes him happy, and I’ll do everything in my power to make it so.

“Here,” he’s still screaming, but now he’s doing it right in my ear since his two little arms are trying to wrap around my neck.

The best feeling in the whole world, having my eardrum burst from the decibels this little guy can produce, and the feel of his arms around my neck strangling me and hugging me at the same time.

“Really,” I feign surprise, leaning into his embrace.

“Tomorrow then, I have to look harder,” he laughs enjoying his win in our fake little game.

In the clusterfuck that’s my life, he’s the only light. I met Claire Saunders ten years ago. It was a blind date set up by our mutual friends, trying to get me to leave the office and live a little. I was constantly working back then, trying to get my business off the ground, not having an interest in anything but business, but after a month of them going on at me, complaining how I have to get out of the box-as they affectionately called my office, eat healthy and start living my life, not only work, I finally gave in. I didn’t expect anything from it, only went to make them stop bitching and bothering me. That was until I saw her. With long brown hair, brown eyes, and nose dusted with freckles, she gave off a cute vibe. The moment she moved the sexy siren woke up, and like every warm-blooded male, I fell for her charms. For the promise written all over her, and for the lure hinting in her every movement.

We started dating, nothing serious, and not for her lack of trying. I never gave her any promises, never made any vows, she was just a convenient fuck when I needed one. I was too busy with work to focus on any female for more than an hour, or hour and a half, depending on my mood. Sure, we became good friends, often talked on the phone and exchanged texts, but it never went anywhere. She knew the deal and was okay with it. Or so she said. In fact, there were several months when we didn’t see or hear from each other, then we would bump into each other on some odd-for me-night out, and it would start for a few weeks, then simmer back down. We were basically fuck buddies, and I was happy with that set-up. And it went that way for years.

The last time, four years ago, we were on again, and I could sense she was gunning for more, as usual, I wasn’t. I was deep into negotiating a deal and wasn’t nowhere near ready to settle down. Guess, Claire disagreed. One night, after a few too many with my prospective clients, I went to her again for a fuck, and to break it off. We were on for five months up until that point, talking via phone a few times a day, and she kept asking for more than I could give. I tried talking to her and explained my situation and how I felt, but she basically begged me for one more night, one more chance to show me it could work. I didn’t want to, but I guess somewhere deep, I knew I owed it to her. I went to her apartment with no intentions of having sex with her; I’m not and never was that big of a dick. She had other ideas on her mind. She waited for me naked.

What happened that night was my mistake.

Her mistake, or plan now that I think about it, was not taking her birth control pills for that cycle, and two months later I found out I was going to be a dad. I had every good intention. I knew what my responsibilities were and are, and after hearing the news of a lifetime, I began to see her in a different light. I married her, and my life in hell had begun.

Now, we didn’t have sex for over a year, and for the last six months, she kicked me out of our bedroom, saying I snored. We stopped being lovers almost a year and a half ago, but we stopped being friends as soon as the ink on a marriage certificate dried. No matter what I did, how I approached her, she shut me down. Didn’t want to talk, didn’t want to spend time with me outside her galas, events, and brunches. She stopped visiting me in my office, stopped calling me to just talk. I missed her at first. I missed my friend. Now, I’m just furious at her, since it’s not just me she’s shutting out. It’s Ben too. Our son. I never understood why people stayed in this kind of marriage. Until I found myself in one.

Whenever I used to hear the words Because of my kids I rolled my eyes. Now, I know. If I even mentioned the big D, she would take Ben and never let me see him. She would fight me for custody, and if I was lucky enough, I would get to see my son only a few hours in a week. And that’s just not acceptable. I would do anything for my son. Anything. Including putting up with his mother.

“Good, you’re here,” the woman in question comes to my sight. She’s ready to go out.

“Kiss, Mommy,” Ben asks.

“Give my kiss to daddy, and he’ll give it to me later. I can’t have you messing up my make-up,” she says not a single feeling in her voice.

“Okay,” my boy beams at her, and lands a heavy one right on my lips. “Don’t forget to give it to mommy later,” he commands, his little cute face all serious.

“I won’t buddy,” I lie to him. There’s no way in hell she’ll let me near her even if I wanted her to.

“Okay, I’m off,” she says like nothing happened. Like she didn’t deny our son affection. I wish I could strangle her sometimes. “See you there at ten.” She slams the front door behind her making Ben jump in my arms.

“Yeah, see you there,” I sigh.

*~*~*

“I’m gonna leave you at home, then I have to go back to the office to wrap some things up,” we’re in a car, in the back seat.

The night was filled with her dragging me by my elbow from one person to the next, completely in her element. The room filled with fake smiles, and fake friendship. I felt that everywhere I looked, screamed fake, just like my marriage.

“Oh,” Claire looks at me from her seat.

We’re a world apart, each of us sitting by our doors, but it feels like there’s an ocean between us. What the hell happened to us? When we got married, I was filled with so much hope, sure that we would make it, have a good and stable marriage. And now, we barely even know each other.

“Yeah, but don’t worry, I’ll be home to sort Ben out in the morning,” I assure her.