Page 164 of Rebellious

“No, there’s not. Yet…knowing…you wouldn’t have done that to her. Your wife. The mother of your children.”

“I probably would’ve just bit it, Mort. I can’t imagine a world without Megan at my side.”

“Exactly. Now do you see—”

“The difference between me and Megan and you and Bailey and Johnnie and Kendall is we ain’t functionally single. We fought hard to save our marriage. Johnnie been a motherfucker that stopped deserving Kendall a long time ago. And Bailey just lost her way—”

“I don’t know what happened to my wife. She hate me.”

Christopher tasted more tequila. “Possibly, but don’t be too fuckin’ sure. Her main fuckin’ problem is guilt and self-hatred. Bailey not forgivin’ you or Harley ‘til she forgive herfuckinself for what happened to Harley.”

“It still doesn’t excuse what I did. I’m nothing but a fucking cheater. How am I going to face my mama-in-law, Prez?”

“You sleepin’ with Kendall again?”

“Fuck no! I shouldn’t have done it this time, but I was…never mind. It don’t matter.”

“Have you talked to her?”

Mortician nodded. “I told her I don’t remember anything.”

“You do, though.”

“Yeah, Prez. She’s so fucking hurt and upset, I couldn’t let her worry about if I’d think about what happened and look at her differently. Or, worse, have her ashamed.”

“Kendall love Johnnie. Her sudden decision to leave immediately make a lot of sense. Howfuckinever, Johnnie doin’ as Diesel suggested is probably the only way to get her to stay so we can get her through this.”

“I agree,” Mort said, subdued and weighted down.

“You both just about fuckin’ divorced, Mortician. As harsh as that fuckin’ is, it’s fuckin’ true. You and Kendall always had a special bond. It make sense you turned to each other when you both so fuckin’ hurt and lonely.” Christopher finished his bottle. “You want to sleep with her again?”

“Not under the circumstances. I regret betraying Bailey and I’m afraid this’ll change me and Kendall’s relationship forever.”

“It already did, but as busy as she always been, she’ll follow your lead, Mort. That’s where Johnnie always fucked up. She needed a guiding hand. Somebody to force her to befuckinhave and to keep her steady. Just do what you always do where she concerned. She’ll get it through her head that you still her friend and what happened didn’t change that.”

“You don’t hold it against me?”

“Nope. I know your heart. You love your family. You risked death on Digger’s behalf several fuckin’ times. You gave up an officer’s position for him. You can’t measure love by money, but with you bein’ such a stingy motherfucker, I say that don’t count for you. And Bailey just had you wrapped around her finger. Which lead to here and now. She so used to having her fucking way, when she said she wanted a baby and you wouldn’t give it to her, it made her unhappy.”

“A baby not a possession, Outlaw,” Mort said in frustration. “Bailey got to know that.”

“In theory. But let her heal, then see if your marriage salvageable.”

“You don’t know what she said,” Mort said quietly.

“I don’t have to know. You wouldna slept with Kendall if it wasn’t completely fucked up and I’ll stake my fuckin’ life on that.”

Mort bowed his head but didn’t say anything.

“Ima tell Megan,” Christopher said. “Not to shame you, but for Kendall. I left a message for her earlier, but she hasn’t called back. Howfuckinever, if I talk to her, it might make shit worse and send her into a tailspin. Megan’ll listen to whatever she need to talk about.”

“Okay, Prez. You think Johnnie finally straightening up?”

“Fuck no. About the only fuckin’ thing that would work is a bullet to the head that erase all his fuckin’ memories and reset his goddamn brain.”

Mort snickered. “I can do that job.”

“Not with those big ass bullets. He won’t have a fuckin’ brain left.”