Page 24 of Waggs

Waggs turned in his seat to AJ, who was looking at the castle in awe. “Isn’t Mommy beautiful, AJ?”

“Like a princess.”

Waggs winked at Willow and dropped a kiss to her upturned lips, the drive to keep kissing her strong, but he knew they had an audience behind them. He pulled away, gripping her chin, so she was looking at him, her eyes dilated, lips plump and soft. “A beautiful princess.”

He alighted from the car and walked around to help AJ out. “You need to keep hold of mine or Mommy’s hand, or you’ll get lost, okay?”

AJ nodded and held tight to his hand. “Can we get ice cream?”

“Sure, but how about we have a walk around first and see if we can see any princesses?”

“Yes.”

AJ jumped up and down, and his excitement was contagious. It was perverse to think it as he was holding her hand and had just had his mouth on Willow, but he wished his brother was here. The lonely ache of missing him never went away, he’d always feel like something was missing but these last two weeks the pain of grief that still hit him when he thought of Aaron had eased, becoming something different.

With the guys around them wandering off in different directions, they all agreed to meet up in an hour near to the beer tent. They moved through the old building, and he pointed out things he thought Willow and AJ would find interesting. AJ was filling in the clues on the sheet of paper he’d picked up at the gate. If he found all ten, he’d win a chocolate soldier.

The walk around the large lake was his favourite, he loved being outdoors, and as he slipped his hand in Willow’s, it felt natural for her to be here with him.

“Do you ever miss the US?”

Her question caught him off guard, but he tilted his head, giving himself a moment to consider it. “Sometimes. I miss my family and the people I grew up with, but those are also the reasons I couldn’t stay.”

“Explain?”

Their hands swayed as the people thinned out in the wooded area, and he could see AJ clearly a few feet ahead of them. “Seeing Mom and Dad and you after Aaron died was just too hard. I felt like everywhere I turned there was this expectation of being everything to fill the void he’d left. I didn’t have it in me to fill the void he’d left in me, let alone do it for everyone else. Then there was everyone watching me, waiting for me to implode or to put my car into a wall. Everyone knew me and knew Aaron and me as a pair. We came as a pack. Even you know that.”

Willow leaned her head against his shoulder. “For what it’s worth, I never saw you and Aaron as a pair. I just saw two incredibly wonderful men who meant the world to me.”

Waggs stopped, pulling her to face him and with the backdrop of the lake and castle behind her, it was hard to keep everything he wanted to say to her inside but now wasn’t the time. “I missed you every day, Wills. I think when we lost Aaron, we were all adrift. What we did that night was us clinging to a life raft.” He felt her pull away and held on tighter, his hands moving to her hips. “I don’t mean that I regretted what we shared. That was, is, always mind-blowing. I should regret it, but I don’t, and I hate myself for it. You were the only person who could’ve stopped me from drowning that day.”

She had tears in her eyes when she looked up at him and so much emotion in her brown eyes. “Oh, Aiden. Please don’t hate yourself. I had mixed feelings about that night at first too, but I want you to know that when I look back at it now, I’m so glad it was you I clung to.”

He felt the pull of the connection between them solidify as they admitted those feelings to each other. It wasn’t an admission of love or anything, although he did love her, always had and always would, but it was a start.

“My legs hurt!”

Waggs looked down to see AJ, shoulders slumped, looking up at them. “Want to ride on my shoulders?”

“Yes.”

The animation on his little face was enough to slay Waggs, and he smiled as he bent, and putting his hands under the boy’s armpits, swung him on to his shoulders. He reached for Willow’s hand with the other, and they made their way back to the central courtyard where the stalls and tents were.

After lining up, which was very British, they got some food and drinks and headed for the grassy area with the others to settle on the grass and watch a children’s entertainer who was doing tricks and making balloon animals.

That part of the grounds were lower, almost like a bowl, and it made the perfect spot for a music gig, which was taking place that evening.

“You staying to watch the show tonight?” Reid asked from where he was with Callie sitting between his thighs talking to Taamira.

“We can’t really, we have AJ and ten is late for him to be out.”

Willow leaned over him to join the conversation. She’d never been shy in that way, always just slotting into a situation or dynamic as if she’d always been there. It was probably why she’d nestled into the fold with him and Aaron.

“You don’t want to see my son when he’s tired. He’s a demon.”

“Like his dad.” Waggs chuckled and saw a shadow flit over her features before she laughed it off.

“Yeah, maybe.”