Page 9 of Jack

Chapter Four

Astrid swiped awayangry tears from her cheeks as she paced her room. The tears weren’t for Jack. He’d caught her at a weak moment when her defences were down. The kiss had been more than she’d hoped for. She’d known it would be amazing, but as usual, Jack had exceeded her expectations.

Jack pulling away with regret shouldn’t have surprised her though. She’d never been the woman who made men stick around. Oh, she could attract them with little more than a smile but keeping them had never worked out for her. She was fine with that because she’d never wanted that either. She was too strong, too self-sufficient, and men found that intimidating.

Even her fiancé had walked away saying he found her emasculating. The worst thing about that period in her life had been the realisation that she wasn’t upset or heartbroken, not as she should have been. Humiliated, yes, but she hadn’t cried herself to sleep because Lorenzo had left.

That was when she’d realised she wanted what her parents had. A real, deep, passionate love she hadn’t seen with anyone else. At least until she saw her friends at Zenobi fall in love and find that exact thing.

She stopped and sat on the bed, flopping back so she was lying on the cool, cotton sheets. Jack was dangerous to her because she could see herself falling for him, and it was becoming clear he didn’t feel the same. He wanted her, that much was true, but he could crack her heart in two if she let him in and he walked away. It would leave her shattered.

He wouldn’t do it because he was a pig. She’d seen the way he cared for his team and his friends and went out of his way to help them, but he was closed off. The moment they’d shared by the beach, and his honest admission, had sparked a hope that maybe she was wrong and he had more to offer her. His swift retreat and the regret she saw in his eyes after, had solidified her decision to stay away.

A roll in the sheets with him would probably be magnificent. She had no doubt a man like Jack knew his way around a woman’s body, but she was a survivor, and her heart was more important than any orgasm he could give her.

Standing, she went to the bathroom and flipped on the shower. She needed to wash the salt from the sea out of her hair. Then she’d go and find herself a nice fruity drink with an umbrella and forget the man who dominated her secret fantasies.

As she stripped and stepped into the shower, letting the warm water rinse away the sand that was everywhere, her mind went back to the original reason she’d sought the refuge of the sea—her sister.

It had been four years since she’d last seen Adeline and she missed her terribly, but it was not knowing what happened to her that kept her awake at night. Wondering if she was alive or dead, if the agency that had disavowed her had done the same to her sister or if she genuinely was dead. Neither of them had ever planned to go into the spy game. She’d wanted to be a nurse, a teacher, and had finally settled on joining the army.

Adeline was the brains of the family and a scientific genius. She’d gone to college and straight into what Astrid had thought was a tedious job. That was until the CIA had recruited her and she’d discovered her sister was a spy.

They’d never had the chance to work together though. Her sister had been killed on an op in South China or so they said.

Towelling off her body, Astrid banished the rest of her thoughts knowing it wouldn’t do any good to wonder the what-ifs. Slipping on a pair of cream capri pants and a pink lace top, she slid her feet into flat ballerina pumps and shoved her hair into a ponytail. A hint of mascara to brighten her eyes and some gloss on her lips, and she felt ready to face the world again and more importantly, Jack.

She should apologise to him for her over-reaction and tell him she agreed it had been a mistake and shouldn’t—no—couldn’t happen again. She had no intention of telling him why; her sister wasn’t his to know about. Although she suspected he knew bits and pieces because of Will.

The bar area, which was more of a sunroom facing the sea and cliffs, only had Decker and Lopez in it when she arrived. She ordered a pineapple juice and half a malibu shot because she was a lightweight and didn’t want to feel the effects of the alcohol when she was here. Technically, she was off duty, but she knew she was never truly off the clock on a tour like this one. If the Queen called, you answered. Day or night.

Taking her drink she turned, not sure if she should join the men or not. She was there as part of the team but was still an outsider.

“Astrid, come join us.” Lopez waved her over, and she smiled, happy he’d taken that awkward moment away for her.

“What are you guys up to?”

Pulling out a chair, she sat beside Decker. The two men couldn’t be more different. Decker thought dressing down meant taking off his suit jacket and leaving his vest and tie on, and Lopez seemed to live in jeans and tees. That wasn’t the only difference. She’d noticed that Decker was reserved, slow to anger, and watchful, whereas Lopez was a real Latino, quick to anger, quick to cool off, friendly, and enjoyed a joke. She wondered if it was a front to hide something or maybe to protect himself.

“Not up to a lot, just enjoying the sun.”

She sucked on her drink with a straw, and the liquid was sweet, fruity, and perfect. “Hmm, I doubt that. Who’s covering mission control?”

“Reid for an hour while I take a break and eat.”

Astrid knew the team could cover each other at a moment’s notice, but each had their specialist focus, and Lopez’s was systems control and data. Although he looked nothing like a pasty, skinny geek with his muscles and tanned skin.

“How are you enjoying the tour and your assignment?”

She angled her head at Decker who’d asked the question and found he was watching her with interest. Not sexual, but still, he was focused. God help the woman he set his sights on because that kind of direct intensity would be hard to resist.

“Actually, I’m enjoying it more than I thought. The Queen is actually pretty cool and has a fun sense of humour when she’s not on duty. She’s still the Queen obviously, but she seems to genuinely appreciate the sacrifices people are making for her, and she loves her people.”

“Good. She likes you too from what Jack says.”

Her damn traitorous heart leapt at his name and the fact he’d mentioned her to Decker. It took all her will power to stop from asking what else he may have said. Despite her decision to avoid Jack and forget this dangerous flirtation with him, her body and heart hadn’t got on board with her head yet. “Good, I’m glad.”

Picking up a peanut from the bowl in front of her, she enjoyed the cool breeze that caught and swept through, blowing the napkin to the floor. She reached to pick it up and saw familiar legs striding towards her and groaned. She wasn’t ready to face him just yet.