Page 75 of Cruel Salvation

THREE YEARS LATER

Everything had changed,but nothing more so than their relationship. They were now living in the barn conversion Damon had bought for them, part of an old farm estate that time had forgotten, and she couldn’t have been happier. All the pain and suffering she’d endured had led her to this moment, to this life that she loved with every part of her being. Their son, Oliver Rykov Cavendish, a product of their love and commitment to one another, was also the reminder of how much they needed each other and how far they’d come since those early days when fear had controlled her every move.

The only thing she hadn’t done was say yes to the marriage proposal Damon made at least twice a year. He was so patient and loving and every time she said no, she felt guilt slam into her for rejecting a man who she loved with her whole broken, cracked heart, but he reassured her that her being his wife was only the cherry and he loved the entire cake.

He knew her fear was that making that commitment would change things, would take the perfect life they had and mess it up. She was so happy with him and Oliver, and it terrified her to think it would ever change, but she knew change wasn’t always bad. She’d changed so much these last few years and all for the better, and Damon seemed to love her harder with every day.

He always made sure to let her know how much he loved her, even when she had doubts or felt lost. He’d recount stories from those first few months—like the time he’d kissed her without wanting anything in return—as a reminder that sometimes life had a funny way of leading people to where they needed to be. Things were different then, but it was those moments that kept her grounded when things got tough and her memories of what they shared kept her strong even through the darkest times.

Over the course of two years, Damon had set up his own practice to help victims of crime seek justice when nobody else cared to find it. Lotus admired his need to make the world a better place and loved him for being that man. Not a day went by when she wasn’t grateful for his love and for the way he’d fought for her, and sometimes against her, to get them to this place.

Being a mother had mellowed her, but she was still her, still the same person who barked and snapped on occasion. Who gave her teammates hell and showed her love for them with sarcasm and snark.

Only Damon and Oliver got her soft side. They were the two people in her life who saw the gentle, vulnerable side and as scary as that was sometimes, especially when having Oliver felt like her heart walked outside her chest, the rewards were indescribably beautiful. Perhaps it was time to shed the fear and do something selfless for the man she loved.

“Hey, what you doing out here, in the dark?”

Lotus turned from where she sat on the balcony off their bedroom and offered Damon a soft smile as he loosened his tie and came towards her. “Waiting for you.”

Damon dipped his head and kissed her, and she fell into the familiar taste of home that never failed to soothe and ignite her. Pushing up, she wrapped her arms around his neck and pressed against him.

Damon cupped her hips and ground his already hard cock against her belly.

“Perhaps I should go away more often if this is the welcome home I get.” Her teeth nipped his bottom lip and he hissed in pleasure. “Hmm, my girl wants to play rough tonight.”

“I just want you to love me, however you please.”

Letting go had never been easy for her, but Damon always seemed to know what she needed and when, and not just in bed. He watched, he listened, and he anticipated. She’d said more than once he’d have made a great operative and he’d shuddered.

“Easiest thing I’ve ever done was loving you, Naz.”

Her head cocked and she regarded him, the moonlight and the lamp beside their bed casting him in shadow. But it didn’t matter, she knew every curve on his handsome face. “I’m not easy to love.”

“You are to me. I know you don’t see it, baby, but Oliver and I adore you. He looks at you as if you hang the moon because, to us, you do.”

Tears stung behind her eyes and she blinked, burying her nose on his shirt, and drawing in the intoxicating scent of him. “Don’t make me cry.”

“Not trying to, just telling you what I see.”

Lifting her head, she gazed at him. “I love you so much, Damon, that sometimes I can’t catch my breath because of the fear of losing you.”

“I know, baby, and the selfish part of me hopes that never goes away because I know it means you love me as much as I love you.”

“You’re the least selfish man I know.”

“I’m selfish with you, Naz. I want you all the time. If I could, I’d move us to our private island and never let you go.”

“You’d miss Gideon and Nadia and the family.”

“I would but the payoff would be you, twenty-four-seven.”

Her laugh was low. “Not sure if that’s not a punishment rather than a prize.”

“A prize. Always a prize, baby.”

“How about you give me a prize tonight?”

“Oh yeah, and what would that be?”