Page 93 of Till Death Do Us Part

My blood ran cold in my veins, and I felt breathless. “Oh, God, Vera,” I breathed.

“I’ve never felt this before,” she growled. “I’ve killed people. I’ve done it because I had to. Because I was ordered to. Because I needed to if I wanted to survive. But I’ve never felt this before. I wanted to kill him. I want to kill him now. I want to kill him slowly. I want to make him suffer. I want to make him feel… everything that I felt. I want him to hurt as much as I hurt, and I want him to die like I was supposed to die.”

“Oh, Vera,” I whispered, wrapping my arms around her and holding her. “I can’t imagine… I…”

“And Glenn… Glenn.” She tightened her fists on the keys. “I trusted him. With everything. With my entire life. He took me in. I was just a kid who had murdered her father, and all I knew was how to kill. He gave me a place when I couldn’t have had another. A family, when I couldn’t have had another. But the whole time… he knew. He knew he’d had them killed. He knew he’d lied to my father, said it was the Whitecliffs. Every time I turned up to do as he asked, he looked at me, and he saw… he saw the girl he tried to kill, the girl who was working for him anyway… and he didn’t hesitate. Not once. Not once. I’ll kill them both.”

My stomach turned, sick and ugly feelings on her behalf, and I held her tightly. “Vera… I won’t stop you. I want to help you. You deserve that much.”

“Listen to you,” she laughed thickly. “You’re supporting me killing people. You want to help kill them?”

“Anyone who did that… who’s still trying to do that to you…” I shook my head. “You always talk about wanting to protect me. To do everything you can to keep me safe. I feel the same way about you, Vera. The things Glenn and Quayle did to you… the things they’ve done to my wife,” I whispered. “I can never forgive that.”

“Don’t fall in love with me,” she said, like it was a joke. It wasn’t.

And what if it was too late?

“I’m here for you. That’s a promise. This isn’t like the Blackbirds, Vera. This is a family that we’ve made… together.”

She kissed me, turned and crushed her lips against mine. I gasped, and I leaned into the kiss, throwing my arms around her, holding her into me as she did—a harsh, angry kiss without any sense of care or delicacy, just taking what she wanted, and I gave it to her. I arched my back for her as she pulled my shirt up, reaching her hands up my body, but she stopped with them at my sides, clutching her fists tightly, and she broke off from the kiss, hovering just away from my lips with her expression drawn tightly.

“Vera?” I whispered. “Do you… do you want…?”

“I can’t.” She put my shirt back down, and she buried her face in my shoulder, holding me into her, as she spoke softly. “I don’t want to hurt you.”

She wasn’t going to. I knew that. No matter how intense we got, she always made sure nothing was wrong.

But that wasn’t what she meant.

She didn’t want to hurt me emotionally. That this thing between us was turning as terrifyingly real for her as it was for me.

I held her tightly, and I whispered, “You never have. And you won’t.”

“You can’t know that. I’ve hurt everyone and everything. All I do is hurt. I’m a monster, Elaine.”

“If you are, then you’ll be my monster. And I’ll hold you as long as it takes for you to see the humanity inside.”

She laughed through tears as she held me. “You’re a damn fool, Elaine.”

I laughed with her, holding her just as tightly. “Then I’ll be your fool.”

A knock from the door interrupted it, and Vera pushed out a heavy breath, pulling back and giving me one more loaded look before she stood up. “What is it?”

Yulia’s voice was sharp and precise from the other side. “Petra’s ready. And aside from wanting to throw a punch at me that would have done more damage to her hand than to me… she’s itching to talk revenge. Caitlyn’s only barely keeping her restrained.”

Vera nodded. “We’ll be there in a second.”

She turned back, and before I could say anything, she gave me one more kiss, the most intense, loaded, and passionate out of any we’d had so far. Not the most heated or sexual, but loaded… differently.

In a way that was so much more terrifying than anything else that had happened between us.

Chapter 45

yulia

It was a strange feeling, seeing the five of them interacting—six if you counted the kitten, who was still clinging to Vera and Elaine like they were her mothers. Elaine’s and Caitlyn’s strong sisterly love. Vera and Petra still pretending that rivalry they had wasn’t just their form of friendship. Petra and Caitlyn both taking shots at each other, affectionately teasing. Jenna fussing over everybody, especially Vera’s and Petra’s injuries.

And of course, most of all, Vera and Elaine, with that incredibly intense bond between them. Unbelievable though it may have been, it was obvious the two of them were falling in love.