Page 33 of Trying Not to Need You

Taking a deep breath, I try to force air into my lungs, trying to think past the way he’s looking at me like I’m not one of his closest friends’ little sister. Like I’m not off-limits. No, he’s looking at me like I’m a choice he’s already made. Determined to make everyone in the room see his intentions clearly.

That’s the most dangerous part of all of this. Because there’s a small, traitorous part of me that wants to believe him. That small part wants to step into his arms, feel them wrapped around me just as they were last night, and just be.

When he held me last night, it didn’t feel wrong or as if it was too soon and I was moving on too quickly. It felt like we fit together, and that’s even more dangerous.

I need to shut down that line of thinking because it will only lead to more heartbreak, right? That’s what history has shown me, and my mind is telling me that history will repeat itself, no matter what my heart is suddenly yearning for.

My grip tightens on the cabinet. “Wedding? Do you even hear yourself right now?” I manage to ask, my voice quiet, not defiant, and definitely unsteady.

His expression doesn’t change. If anything, it softens. Just enough to make my stomach flip. “Yeah, Baylor,” he says simply, “I do.” His lips tilt in a smile at the pun, whether intended or not.

He’s the air of certainty. No hesitation, no visible doubt. He’s not backtracking or retracting his words. Instead, he remains steadfast, standing behind what he said, and the way those green eyes of his are locked on mine, he’s willing me to believe him.

I don’t know what to do with that.

I don’t know what to do with him.

I don’t know how to handle the fact that my entire world, for the second time in a matter of weeks, feels like it’s tilting in a new direction.

Toward him.

Quiet surrounds us. I have no idea where to go from here, but Macklin decides for me. He steps into my office, pulling his body away from the doorframe he was resting against. It’s only a few strides until he’s standing in front of me. He bends and presses a kiss to my forehead. “Have a good day,” he whispers, but not low enough that my sisters don’t hear him. When he stands to his full height, he waves at them. “You ladies enjoy your day,” he says, and then he’s gone.

“Holy hell, Bay, that was smoking hot,” Courtlynn says, waving at her face with her hands.

“That’s a side of Macklin I’ve never seen before,” Ellison tells me.

“He’s—wow,” Leighton says, apparently at a loss for words.

“See!” I exclaim, throwing my hands in the air. “I don’t know what to do. I’m barely out of a long relationship. It’s too soon to jump into another one.”

“Says who?” Courtlynn counters.

“You’re the only one who gets to decide what’s right for you, Baylor. Not us, not Macklin, not society. Whatever you want. Whatever makes you happy. That’s what we want for you.”

“Do you think that could be Macklin?” Leighton asks. “Do you think that he can make you happy?”

“He says he can, but I know all too well that men will tell you one thing when they mean another.”

“Baylor Moran,” Ellison scolds in that stern I am the older sister, you must listen to my voice tone. “That’s not fair. Not all men are the same, and Macklin’s never given you reason not to trust him.”

“Do you trust him?” I counter, putting her on the spot.

“I do.” Ellison nods. “He’s a good guy, and while I had no idea that he was harboring feelings for you, I can tell you that no one around here has caught his eye.”

“We should test him,” Courtlynn says, excitement in her voice.

“I don’t want to play games, Court.”

“No games, but a test. The next time he’s out with the guys, we’ll send in a spy. I can call Lorna and have her go and keep an eye on him. Hell, maybe I’ll have her hit on him.”

“No. I don’t want to do that.”

“Party pooper,” she mutters.

“He’d pass,” Leighton speaks up.

“What makes you so sure?” I ask, needing to hear her answer.