Page 59 of A Christmas Wish for the Village Midwife

‘Even on the water?’

‘Of course. They’re not going to have everyone freezing on there. Ah…’ Zoe nodded at a man who was walking towards them. ‘That’s Lavender’s brother-in-law.’

‘Hello, Zoe!’

‘Hi, Patrick! How are you?’

‘Can’t complain, and nobody would listen if I did. Here you go…’ He handed Zoe some tickets, causing one or two of the people in the queue to regard them curiously.

‘It’s really good of you to do this – thank you so much. Here…’ Zoe got a box of chocolates from her bag and handed them to him. ‘It’s not much but a little something for you. Share them in the office or with the crew or whatever you want to do.’

‘As if I’d share them!’ he said, laughing, before turning to Billie. ‘Hello. And hello to you too,’ he added, smiling at Louisa. ‘She’s beautiful. So…’ he added to Zoe, angling his head at Billie, ‘you two are sisters?’

‘Patrick!’ Zoe smiled. ‘I can see what you’re trying to do there, and thank you for the compliment, but no, we’re not sisters. I’m about thirteen years older than Billie.’

‘She’s dating my dad,’ Billie said.

‘More than dating,’ Zoe replied. ‘We live together. All of us, at Hilltop Farm… Do you know it?’

Patrick shook his head. ‘Can’t say I do, but lucky Dad.’ He winked at Zoe from beneath his bushy black brows.

A murmur started to ripple down the queue, and Zoe looked to see that the gates to the jetty were being undone.

‘Time to board,’ Patrick said. ‘Have a good trip. Come and see me again, won’t you? I don’t mind having my day brightened every now and again.’

‘Thanks.’ Zoe held up the tickets. ‘You’re a star!’

Patrick left them and walked back to the shack at the lakeside he worked from.

Billie watched him with a look of deepest suspicion. ‘He fancies you,’ she said, glancing briefly at Zoe before turning her gaze back to him.

Zoe laughed. ‘Don’t be daft.’

‘And he’s old enough to be your dad.’

‘He doesn’t fancy me.’

‘What was all that “are you sisters?” stuff then? And the wink? And the free tickets?’

‘It’s just how his generation is. And he got us the tickets because Lavender asked him to, so I don’t think we should look a gift horse in the mouth.’

Billie seemed unconvinced but was then distracted once again at the sight of Louisa chewing on her hat. ‘For God’s sake, leave it on!’

The queue started to move, and a couple of minutes later they were on board. The cabin was festooned in tinsels and tacky friezes of cartoonish Christmas scenes, and there were tinny orchestral arrangements of well-known carols being piped in through a crackling sound system.

‘This feels like a sensory overload waiting to happen,’ Billie said as her gaze ran along the walls and then over the other families getting settled with their children.

Zoe had to admit she had a point. Along with all the Christmas-themed sights and sounds was the smell of hot chocolate and mulled wine, which they were meant to get for free at some point during the voyage, and already the air was filled with excited chatter, complaints and impatience from the packed rows of seating. Little eyes were everywhere, gazing at the boat, or out on the water in wonder, or feverishly searching for a glimpse of the man in red they’d all come to see. Every other word from every child’s mouth was Santa, and the rest of the sentence usually involved what present they might get once they’d met him.

‘I can’t imagine Louisa being that old,’ Billie said, watching a girl of around four standing on her seat to better scan the deck.

‘It’ll come quick enough,’ Zoe said.

‘That’s what Dad says. He says he can’t imagine me at Louisa’s age now, and it seems like five minutes ago to him. I can’t imagine I might be saying that to Louisa one day either.’

‘Don’t wish it upon yourself,’ Zoe said. ‘If I were you, I’d enjoy each day as it comes and worry about that in twenty years.’

Billie turned an expression so full of pity onto Zoe that she didn’t quite know how to feel. But there was no mistaking the root of it, and Zoe didn’t want to talk about that now. She’d made her peace with her infertility – just like she kept on telling Alex and anyone else who would listen. There would be times, like now, that would have her reflecting on her choices and wondering whether they were the right ones. There would be times where she’d be slapped by a yearning so strong she’d struggle not to be poleaxed by it. She felt it now, watching as the girl who had prompted their current conversation threw her arms around her mother’s neck and kissed her with excited glee. But she’d made the decision she felt was best for her life and her circumstances, the one that in the end she hoped would cause her the least pain. She had to have faith that it was the right one because to go through life never knowing, never feeling any certainty about it, would feel like a torment that would never end.