Page 78 of A Christmas Wish for the Village Midwife

‘Better places than this?’ Alex swept a hand over dark hills dressed in tiny lights, at a moon bathing their crests in silver and swirling masses of stars overhead.

‘Yes,’ Billie said. ‘It’s freezing here all the time. There’s nothing to do. Everyone is about a hundred. All the people my age have moved away, and I don’t blame them. I hate it here! I’ve always hated it, and I only tried to like it because you wanted to stay!’

Alex’s mouth opened and closed, but no sound came out.

‘Is that really how you feel?’ Zoe asked.

Billie started to walk again. ‘I’m going to get Louisa from Ottilie’s, and then I’m going back to Hilltop. You don’t need to come; I said you could stay and watch the rest of the play. I’m not bothered.’

‘How are you going to get up there, though? It’s far too dark to walk.’

‘Yes it is,’ Billie said. ‘Just another reason to love living here – you can’t go anywhere because it’s too dark, or too cold, or too far. I’ll get an Uber.’

‘You’d never get an Uber to come out this far tonight,’ Zoe said.

Billie threw her hands into the air with an exasperated sigh. ‘I was being sarcastic! As if something that exists everywhere else in the world is going to exist here! I’ll have to walk! What do you want from me? I can’t walk, and I can’t get an Uber or ask Heath, but I’ve got to do one of them, haven’t I?’

‘I’ll drive you home,’ Alex said.

‘I’ll do it,’ Zoe replied. ‘You go back inside.’

‘But…’

She tried to telegraph, without words, how it would be better for her to drive Billie home, to see if she could subtly, and with more patience than she sensed Alex had, get to the bottom of what was really going on with his daughter. He was too emotional, too hurt by all she’d just said, and if they were to go back to Hilltop together now, their conflict would only worsen, both of them digging their heels in, both more determined than ever to make their point the one that stuck. But Zoe could listen – she had enough distance to let Billie say her piece and talk herself into a more reasonable frame of mind. At least, she hoped so.

‘I don’t want anyone to drive me home,’ Billie said. ‘I know you hate driving up there in the dark. I’ll stay with Ottilie until the play is finished. Then you can come and get me.’

‘You don’t really imagine we can just go back in now and watch the rest of it, knowing that you’re with Ottilie, feeling this way?’ Zoe said.

‘I don’t want to ruin your night.’

‘It’s too late for that,’ Alex said.

Zoe frowned at him. ‘That’s hardly helping.’

‘But it’s true. Why don’t we talk over what this is really about.’

‘It’s not about anything,’ Billie fired back. ‘I just thought the panto was stupid.’

‘I don’t believe you.’

‘You actually thought that was good?’ Billie flung her arm out in the direction of the village hall. ‘You just sat through that and thought there might be another reason for me leaving? Sometimes, Dad, you can be so delulu.’

‘Maybe, but I know you,’ Alex said. ‘I know when it’s that simple and when it’s not. Keeping whatever it is bottled up isn’t helping anyone.’

‘I’m not keeping anything bottled up!’

‘Both of you’ – Zoe held out her hands to get their attention – ‘we can’t do this here! Let’s all go and fetch Louisa and go home. We can talk there.’

‘There’s nothing to talk about!’ Billie shouted. ‘Stop interfering – you don’t even belong in this family, so stop pretending like you do!’

Zoe stepped back, Billie’s words like a punch to the gut, and in the time it took for her to collect her wits, Alex launched a defence – one she hadn’t asked for and didn’t want.

‘What the hell is wrong with you? How can you talk to Zoe like that after everything she’s done for you? She’s made her whole life about you and Louisa since she moved in with us – she’s every bit as much family as anyone!’

‘Alex,’ Zoe pleaded, ‘don’t. It doesn’t matter.’

‘No, it does! Billie, I get that you’ve been through a lot, but it doesn’t excuse your behaviour. Sometimes I just don’t understand what goes through your head.’