Page 150 of By the Flames of Her Fury

I shrugged. “Sometimes it’s hard to breathe anywhere else.”

“How are you feeling?” she asked.

“Honestly?” I rubbed a hand on the back of my neck. “I don’t know. When I close my eyes, I still see that altar. Those bodies, the faces…” I shook my head. “I can feel it. What they almost did to me. I was—it was so empty. So cold.” I cleared my throat, trying to banish the phantom pain.

Her throat bobbed as she swallowed. “I’m so sorry, Everett. I wish I could take it away.” She slowly stepped in the water. The waves rippled as she waded closer. I shivered when she placed both hands on my chest, muscles flexing beneath her touch. Her hands glowed a soft orange, and warmth spread from my chest over my entire body. It was a different kind of heat than the hot springs. This warmth seeped deeper, bringing comfort and peace. Her magic pushed away the memories, letting me finally take a full, deep breath.

My chest expanded as I inhaled. Her eyes fell to the tattoo resting under her right hand. She raised her fingers to hover over the delicate black wing inked above my heart. Even the mere whisper of her touch made my pulse race.

“It’s a songbird,” she said. I merely nodded. “When did you get it?”

“After you left.”

Her eyes locked with mine again. “Why?”

I took her hand and gently pressed her palm against the wing. “Because I had hope that one day, you’d fly back to me.”

She hummed softly. “I don’t know how you do it.”

“Do what?”

Her eyes softened. “Have so much faith.”

I cupped her cheek, and she leaned into me. “I wrote you letters.” My voice echoed in the empty chamber. “Any chance I could.”

She ran her fingers through the water, sending ripples over us both. “I know.”

I stilled. “You do? How?”

“They just appeared in my bag. I found them right after I woke up this morning. After you were…” She took a deep breath, and I didn’t miss the hitch in her voice. “I thought I lost you, Everett. You were gone again, just like last time. And all—all I could think about was how you never gave up on me.”

I looked at her, truly looked. Ash still streaked her cheeks. She hadn’t changed yet, and her clothes were torn and bloodstained, her hair tangled from the fight. She walked through those catacombs for me. She endured more loss today and held herself tall the entire time.

“You didn’t give up on me, either,” I said. I slowly kissed her forehead, and felt her shuddering breath on my skin. “You’ve been taking care of everyone else, but how are you doing?”

“I have to be okay,” she said. “There’s so much happening. So many things we have to fix.”

I pulled away and tipped her chin up with my thumb, my eyes darting between hers. “That’s not an answer, sweetheart,” I murmured.

She squeezed her eyes shut. “I just—I keep thinking, what if I’d been too late? What if I got there and you were already—” She stopped. “I don’t know what I would’ve done.”

“I do. You would’ve kept going, because that’s who you are.”

“I’m not sure that’s true.” She shook her head. “I don’t know who I really am anymore without a mission. Without something to be angry at.”

“I know who you are.” My thumb brushed across her cheek. “You’re the girl who shared her nuts with a hungry boy in a cell,” I said, earning a soft laugh. “You’re the one who sang to me through a wall. You’re the one who gave me hope when I’d given up on ever seeing the sun again.”

She let out a breath, and a tear collected in the corner of her eye.

“You’re the girl who recklessly throws herself in front of monsters. The one who fights to the very end for people who need rescuing.” My hand slid around the back of her neck, cradling her head. “You’re the girl who saves her happiness for her dreams because you think that’s where it belongs. But I’m here to prove you wrong.”

For a moment, she didn’t say anything. She pulled back, eyes searching my face as her guard slowly, slowly fell away. “I don’t see what you see,” she admitted softly. “Most days I look at myself and all I see are the memories of what they made me do. I don’t know how to look past that, but I’m trying.” Her palms rested on my chest, over my tattoo. “I haven’t had many good things in this life. But you, Everett Swift…” Her voice broke. “You’re the one thing that always felt like home.”

I found the edge of her tunic and grazed my thumb over her hip, feeling her stomach tighten at my touch. “Then let me love you, Songbird,” I whispered. “That’s all I’ve wanted since I heard your voice in that cell.”

She pushed up onto her toes, lips hovering a breath from mine as if she was daring herself to fall. With an exhale, she crashed into me.

And we burned.