Page 147 of Falling for the Enemy

He pulled his phone from his pocket and stared at it, scrolling back through the messages he’d received while he’d been trapped at the golf course. Trying to understand why she couldn’t talk to him, hear him out.

I need you.

Soren!!!

Fish emergency. Half the menu’s dead.

His head dropped in defeat. He hadn’t been able to focus earlier when he should have been reading between the lines. Maybe he’d been too preoccupied with the jet situation, or maybe it was Warren’s constant observation that made him not realize the damage he was doing.

Each text tightened like a fist around his heart.

He’d been playing golf. Playing fucking golf while she was drowning. She had every right to be mad at him.

Sliding past his last text, his lame apology, he opened her contact and called her again.

“This is Jocelyn. Leave a message. But if you want a response, text.”

Soren hurled the phone across the room. “Fuck!”

This couldn’t be the end of them. He refused to accept that she could walk away like this. He loved her, and he thought she loved him.

She didn’t have to say the words for it to be true. He felt it every time she touched him, every time he caught her staring. The way her gaze lingered, and when her lips parted every time he held her. Every time he gave her a safe space to be fragile.

He swore to protect her, and he’d done the exact opposite, letting her down and not showing up when she needed him. It took so long to finally build her trust, and now that trust was broken.

Somehow, he would get her to understand this was a once in a million mistake and he would never let anything like this happen again. If she wasn’t going to pick up the phone, maybe he should just go there. Fuck what Logan said.

His intensity was what drew her in, after all, but it also had a way of scaring her off. He knew her, which was why he’d done his best to handle obstacles without involving her. His approach had worked fine until it didn’t.

How the hell was he supposed to predict getting stranded in Newport?

Closing his eyes, he recalled how she looked, sitting alone in the restaurant. There had been no life left in her eyes, no real emotion on her face. She’d looked…empty.

He should have realized how much she’d been counting on him to be there. He should have prioritized better, not just for her, but for his brother and Wren.

Bending forward, he locked his fingers in his hair and pulled.

His mind flashed to the last time they made love and how perfect it had been. She’d been scared, but also courageous, despite the tremor in her voice when the fear crept in.

Where was his brave girl now?

Didn’t she want to fight for them? Or maybe she really thought he wasn’t worth the effort.

His father’s diminishing words came hurling back to him.

You live in a fantasy world…

Life isn’t fair…

You’re not as special as you think you are…

Men like you are a dime a dozen…

Flinching back from the sharp edge those memories still carried, he pictured Jocelyn. She thought he was special, didn’t she?

Or at least she had.

Something in his chest tightened. His heart felt like it was being pulled apart, muscle and tissue ripping to shreds as he sat here wondering how the fuck he was going to fix this.