Page 64 of Under the Influence

I drag my sweats down my legs and kick them to the foot of the bed. It’s always hot in here because mom is constantly freezing, but Dad and I will sneak and turn the air down. I guess that is what’s going to happen tonight. I sling the covers off and tiptoe to the thermostat. The fan kicks on, and I sneak back to my room to find Cori sitting on the edge of my bed.

I look between her soft hair and the open window.

She’s wearing an oversized sweatshirt and tight-fitted biker shorts, her hair softly hanging against the fabric. Perfection.

Did I mention she is on my bed?

“You trying to give me a heart attack,” I ask.

She sighs, slipping under the sheets, “I snuck out.”

I slip into bed with her, brushing off the fact that I’m in my boxers and nothing else. My best friend just claimed this girl in front of the whole school, but I’m currently in bed with her. Jesus, what is wrong with me?

“Is that okay?” she sighs. “I know I shouldn’t be here. Maybe I should just go.”

She starts to get up, but I pull her back down.

“No, it’s alright. We’re friends. Just stay.”

“Good,” she exhales, falling back dramatically on the pillow next to mine. “I could really use a friend.”

“Well, here I am. Carson Graham, at your service.”

She giggles, turning over to me, her arm ideally situated between her head and the pillow. “Oh yeah? Lucky me then.”

I can’t help but grin at her, “I don’t know how you even have room for me to be your friend between Madden’s massive ego and Lainey’s big mouth.”

She tilts her brows together, “Madden isn’t like that at all. Have you even made an effort to get to know him outside of baseball?”

Truthfully, no. I haven’t. I’ve kept the same few friends for years in fear of being taken advantage of. If they were there before the fame, they stayed. Avery is the same way, a small circle. It’s all we’ve ever known, and now that she has even more followers than me, and has practically been using our relationship for the world like a damn reality tv show, she’s more influential than I am.

The girls listen to her every word and take everything she says as if it’s the bible. They worship her like a god, like a queen. What happens when we tell the world that it’s not always rainbows and sunshine? That there’s trouble in paradise?

The answer is simple: uproar.

Her followers will turn on me. They’ll blame me for everything. Mine? They’ll do the same. It’ll be hundreds of thousands of people thinking they know us, making up stories for the press, all lies.

“Where’d you go?” Cori asks, snapping me out of it.

“Sorry, I… no. I guess you’re right. I don’t know him, but he doesn’t know me either.”

“I guess that’s fair. Who are you, Carson?” she asks, and immediately I recognize what a loaded question that is. “I want your version, not what everyone else thinks.”

“That’s the problem. I’ve spent so long being who everyone else wants me to be that I don’t even know who I really am anymore.”

She nods, “I understand that.”

“Can I tell you a secret?” I ask, allowing my bare leg to touch hers. Her eyes twinkle back at me, and I say it before really thinking it through, something I’ve never said aloud.

“I don’t really even like baseball that much anymore.”

Her hand covers her mouth in shock, and it’s adorable. “Don’t worry,” she laughs. “I won’t tell your adoring fans. Why play though, if you hate it?”

“Woah, woah, woah. I never said I hated it. I love the game. It’s just that I'm under a lot of pressure. We won state last year, and everyone is counting on me to get us there again.”

“And if you don’t?”

“That’s not an option. The whole town expects it, and I will get us there.”