Page 56 of A Daddy to Love

His wet blue eyes peered up at me. “You do? I do, yes. But I made a scene. I’m sorry. It’s horrible-awful behavior. I felt suddenly very little.”

“It’s all right. That’s what littles do.”

“No. Not me. I’m a very good boy.” He frowned. “Except for lying.”

“I think I understand it, though. Tell me if I’m wrong.”

He huffed up. Nodded.

“You’ve been here in this big house all alone, right?”

“There’s no one else but staff… even though they’re all nice.”

“Right. And when we met, things got going pretty quickly. At least, for me.”

“Me, too, Daddy.”

I smiled. “It’s not just about worrying what others might think. It’s about how you feel deep inside. Your caring nature. Everything about you is pure affection and honesty, baby. You’ve shown me so much and I’m grateful. In fact, I’m in awe of you. We’ve come far. My place is where we’ve done all our firsts. I think you’re pretty comfortable there, right?”

He wiggled closer. “It’s warm and smells good and I feel safe. I love it.”

“That’s exactly what I mean. You associate my place with all the things you maybe wanted but never had. And this place, which is a beautiful house with everything a person could ever want, still holds something my place was an escape from.”

He had stopped shivering, his gaze intent on me. “What, Daddy?”

“Loneliness.” I paused. “Do you think maybe that’s right?”

Little wrinkles appeared above his nose, his thinking face. “I’m alone.” His chest rose and fell. “But you get used to it.”

“Hmm. But maybe you didn’t want to be used to it.”

“And maybe I was afraid people will see all this.” He waved his arm through the air. “And not me.”

“That makes sense. But I still see you.”

The frown deepened and his mouth went crooked.

I spoke the words again. “I see you, baby. Everything private you’ve shown me, I see it. And I love it. I love everything about you.” I glanced upward. “And now this part of you, too.”

He followed my gaze around the room.

“If we really care about each other,” I continued, “we’re going to show each other more and more. This was going to happen. I was going to see this house eventually. And meet Sorel and all of it. Why? Because of trust. But was it too soon, sweetheart. Do you not completely trust me?”

His eyes widened. “I do, Daddy. But it’s scary. It made me afraid because I love you.”

I pressed my palm to his cheek. “I not only love you, baby, I’m in love with you. Maybe I should have told you that before now. But now I have.”

“In—in love?”

“Too fast?”

“No.” The word came out followed by a high-pitched squeak and a bounce. “I’m in love, too.” He buried his face in my chest.

I petted his back. “It can be overwhelming. Make a person desperate-feeling. Scared and happy and needy and alive all at once. It can almost feel like being sick.”

“Daddy, yes. That’s exactly it.”

I chuckled. “So glad I’m not alone in this.”