Page 96 of Jay Bird

“Good night, baby.”

“Ellie.”

“Yes. Good night, Ellie too.”

Willow stood and started toward the door.

“Momma?”

She immediately turned.

Lily’s eyes were already closing. “Wuv you.”

Willow’s heart melted. “I love you too.”

She left the door partially open and stood in the hallway for a few seconds, listening for any sign that Lily was awake. But the house remained quiet.

Lily was fine, but Willow was beginning to question whether she could say the same about herself. She knew exactly where she was supposed to go now.

“Okay,” she whispered. “It’s just sleeping.”

Which sounded completely ridiculous when she said it aloud, especially since she had already kissed the man, sat on his lap, and fallen asleep against him on the couch more than once.

They had even had a few kisses over the past month that had gone well beyond innocent. Nothing she couldn’t handle, and nothing Jay Bird hadn’t immediately slowed down the second he sensed her becoming overwhelmed.

She trusted him. That wasn’t the problem. The problem was that a bed felt different, and being in a bedroom with him carried a weight she wasn’t sure she was ready to handle.

And as Willow stepped into the bathroom and closed the door behind her, memories she didn’t want began scratching at the edges of her mind.

She showered, deliberately taking her time. She washed dirt from beneath her fingernails and scrubbed the remnants of the day’s work from her skin before standing beneath the warm spray longer than necessary. Eventually, she forced herself to turn off the water.

After drying off, she pulled on her pajamas, brushed her teeth, then stood in front of the mirror.

Her reflection stared back.

“You said yes because you wanted to,” she whispered.

And she did, and that mattered.

Still, when Willow stepped into the hallway, her feet carried her several steps toward Jay Bird’s office before she stopped.

The bed was in there, and she could sleep there tonight if she wanted. Jay Bird wouldn’t be upset or question her, and he certainly wouldn’t make her feel guilty. In fact, she suspected he would wish her good night and make sure she had everything she needed.

Willow looked toward his bedroom. She wanted to sleep beside him, and that was what frustrated her most. Her mind knew exactly what it wanted, but some part of her was still stuck three years in the past, reacting as though she were still trapped there.

She closed her eyes, reminding herself that this wasn’t Chen’s house and she wasn’t trapped. Nobody was going to walk through a door and demand something from her.

This was Jay Bird, and tonight was her choice.

Willow turned away from the office. She walked to Jay Bird’s room, where the door stood open, just as she knew it would. She paused in the doorway, suddenly unsure whether she was ready to take the next step.

Jay Bird sat against the headboard in a gray T-shirt and black sleep pants, one leg stretched out as he looked at something on his phone.

He glanced up, and his expression softened immediately.

“Hey.”

“Hi.”