Page 44 of Sight Unseen

“Yeah, but maybe I should convince you.” Dev’s eyes sparkled wickedly as he pinned me to the ground. “I’ll make you a believer with a kiss.”

The kiss was sweet and later that night Dev helped me forget about Nate, Blu and my mom.

***

The following morning, I showered at Dev’s then left, ready to spend Sunday at home cleaning up and answering long-overdue emails. Finally, unable to bear it any longer, I changed out of my Star Wars Jedi dressing gown and into grown-up clothes. I left the house mid-afternoon and drove down to Nate’s place, hoping he was home. I had to get over my hissy fit and get back on track with him.

The fact he was moving on would not wipe out over twenty years of friendship.

When I got to his house, I let myself in. Remembering the last time I’d walked in on him, I made sure to holler out when I went through the front door. I wasn’t going to lie and say I didn’t want to see him jerking off again, but I didn’t want to be a stalker.

“Nate. I’m here. Are you decent?”

The house smelled of pot and I frowned. Nate indulged occasionally, as did I, but this smelled pretty rank. I wrinkled my nose in disgust.

“Nate, where are you?”

As panic built, I searched the house. I found him lying on the deck, earphones in, stark naked and looking stoned. I wasn’t ashamed to admit my eyes were drawn to the delicious cock lying among a clipped bush of dark hair. I picked up a towel from a deck chair and threw it over his groin. He sat up hurriedly, dislodging the towel, and squawked in panic as he removed his earphones.

Shit, there was that cock again. I picked up the towel again and shoved it into his hands.

“Who’s there? Cody, is that you?”

“Yeah, you idiot. Put something on for God’s sake. What the hell is going on? The place stinks of pot. Did you smoke a whole damn dime bag?”

Both relief and disappointment pinged when Nate stood and wrapped the towel around his waist.

“Uhm, no, not the whole thing. I’ve got some left if you want, bud. It’s in the kitchen.”

“No thanks. I’m not in the mood. What’s the matter with you? You could have fallen and hurt yourself or something.”

He burst into laughter and fumbled around, looking for the deck chair. He found it and flung himself into it. The towel shifted but didn’t reveal anything. Fate was smiling on me. Or not.

Yeah, I’d been miffed at him for being a little stoned, because he could have hurt himself—but there was something on his face that jabbed straight into my heart. His eyes were bloodshot, but the look of despair in them was unmistakeable. His hands fidgeted on his toned stomach as he stared up hazily, a soft curl of hair falling over his forehead.

I sat beside him and took his hand. His fingers wrapped around mine tightly. His eyes went out of focus then cleared, and a shuddering sigh wracked his body. I was scared. I’d never seen Nate this high on anything before. He wasn’t the dependent type.

If that bastard Blu had done something to hurt Nate, I was going to kill him.

I stroked his hand softly. “What’s going on? Did something happen on your date last night?”

Nate shook his head. “Last night?” A short, desperate laugh came out of his mouth. “No, nothing happened last night. That’s the problem.”

“What do you mean?” I leaned over and brushed the hair from his sweating forehead.

He let go of my hand and passed a trembling hand over his eyes. “Never mind. I’m not date material, that’s all. No good to anyone.”

My throat constricted at the pain in those words. “You’re good to me, baby. Best friends, remember?”

Nate gave a hoarse chuckle. “Maybe that’s the answer.”

“Huh?” I was confused. “You’re not making sense. Spill it.”

He waved a hand. “You know, best friends. No strings, no ties.” He patted the top of his towel and I swallowed. The towel was beginning to tent. “We could jack off together, get rid of some of this tension I have. Guys do that, don’t they? Jack off in front of each other, because it’s fun?”

My heart beat faster and I clenched my fists. After the shitty few days I’d had, my temper was close to the surface. Was he seriously suggesting we take out our cocks and jerk off? Didn’t he realize what it might do to me? What it meant to me?

I guess not. I’d never told him.