Page 29 of Cherry Picking

Hazel. she’s my best friend, and she’s also a divorce attorney.

Briggs

a divorce lawyer and a mortician walk into a bar . . .

Evie

I am not a mortician!

Briggs

gravedigger, then

Evie

death care professional

Briggs

absolutely not

Evie

that is the industry standard terminology

Briggs

who’s your branding manager? a vampire?

Evie

are you judging my career path?

Briggs

it is objectively morbid

Evie

has anyone ever mentioned you can be an asshole?

Briggs

once or twice

We keep trading barbs for another half hour, the conversation effortless. When I finally look at the time, the regret lands immediately.

Evie

didn’t realize it was getting this late . . .

Briggs

isn’t it only nine in the valley?

Evie

yeah, but I have an early morning at Sutton’s. besides, I know you need your rest to stay that pretty