Page 131 of Smoke and Glitter

The brass plate is propped on the corner of my desk behind her. SMOKE catches the light when I look past Bex.

"If I ask Autumn whether she wants me to come, then I'm making her responsible for whether I go." I shift in the chair, trying to get the thought out without dressing it up. "If she says yes, I get to tell myself she asked for this. If she says no, I stay here and never have to find out what would've happened if I'd shown up and actually said what I should've said months ago."

Bex's fingers stop turning the pen.

"Getting on the plane is my decision," I say. "Whether she gives me any of her time once I'm there is hers."

For a moment she just looks at me. Then she lowers her eyes to the schedule and draws a firm line through my name on Sunday.

"All right. Tony takes Friday close. I'll do Saturday and Sunday, and Marisol can cover the early part Saturday so I don't murder anybody."

"Appreciate the sacrifice."

"You should. I'm charging you for it."

"Put it on my tab."

Bex gives me a small nod and leaves, pulling the door almost closed behind her.

I reach for my phone.

The airline app opens to my last trip, and I clear the destination before typing London. Flights populate across the screen while my brain immediately starts reaching for everything practical. Arrival times. Hotels. How quickly I can turn around if Autumn doesn't want to see me. Whether I should book three nights or four. Every detail that can be arranged before I have to face the one thing I can't arrange at all.

Her answer.

I choose a Friday flight that gets me there Saturday morning and enter my information. By the time the purchase screen appears, my pulse is beating hard enough that I can feel it against the phone in my hand.

There is still time to close the app.

Getting on this plane doesn't mean Autumn will forgive me. It doesn't mean she'll take me back. It doesn't even mean she'll agree to see me.

For once, I don't need the next answer before I make this choice.

I press confirm.

Chapter twenty-five

Chapter Twenty-Five

Sam

By Thursday afternoon, Bex already has everything she needs for the weekend.

I discover this when I walk into the office intending to give her some version of a handoff and find the schedule open on her laptop with my name nowhere on it. Friday, Saturday and Sunday are covered. Tony has both closes he needs, Marisol's hours are shifted, and there are notes beside two performers I don't recognize until I realize they're changes Bex made without involving me.

She looks up from the screen. "What?"

"I was going to go over the weekend."

"You can."

She agrees too fast, and it makes me suspicious.

I pull out the chair across from her. "You already did it."

"I did the schedule."

"And the deliveries?"