Page 93 of Callous Shot

“Show me.”

Unlocking my phone, I handed it to him, and he swore under his breath as he studied the photo I’d taken of Lincoln’s laptop screen.

“See?” Rubbing at my chest again, I did my best to breathe through the waves of betrayal that were suffocating me. My heart felt like it was cracking down the middle. How could one human withstand this kind of pain? The kind of pain a doctor couldn’t heal?

“I see. Listen, Dan, I don’t…I don’t have an explanation for you, not yet. But I promise I’m going to get to the bottom of this. I need to speak with Lincoln’s uncle, and in the meantime, I want you to stay here. Maybe give Ryker and Jay a heads-up, get them to come over, if you feel up to it, or go back to the hockey house and be with the rest of your friends. Do not, under any circumstances, speak to Lincoln until I’ve spoken to Mike.”

“You don’t have to worry about that. I’m never fucking speaking to him again.” Fresh pain tore through my body as the full reality of the past few hours hit me, and I gasped for breath, barely aware of Neil leaving the room as I stabbed at my phone screen until I had Lincoln Bellingham blocked in every single place.

Hitting my own profile, I was confronted with countless pictures, many of them uploaded with Lincoln in mind to get a reaction from him. Biting down on my lip, I deactivated my profile. Then another, and another, until I was wiped from existence.

Throwing my phone onto the rug, I turned to my mum, who gave me a sad smile. “Do you want to talk about it?”

“No. What were you going to say before Neil came in?”

“I shouldn’t have said anything. How about a cup of tea? It always helps.”

“Mum, please don’t change the subject. I can’t… This is really fucking hard for me. How did you know I was talking about L—him?”

“I’m your mum. I know things.” She paused, her hand finding mine. “You’ve been in love with that boy for years.”

“I— What? I’ve always hated him.”

She squeezed my hand. “Perhaps you did, in a way. But it’s always been clear to me that you have very strong feelings for him.”

“That’s a lie!”

“Daniel. He’s been your favourite topic of conversation for years. Granted, your animosity has always been clear, but the way you’ve always spoken about him, well…it was obvious, at least to me…” She trailed off, shaking her head. “It’s also clear that things have changed between you recently. He’s been here at least twice in the past few days, and you allowed him to partake in a sensitive mission. You have his photos on your bedroom wall.”

“You snooped in my room!”

“I hoovered your room.”

“Same thing.” I slumped back on the sofa, letting my head fall back as I squeezed my eyes shut. My voice came out in a whisper. “I’ve messed everything up. I didn’t make him leave the mission, and now I’ve put everyone in danger. I-I’m gonna be exiled from the firm, and Neil’s never going to speak to me again.”

“Has anyone ever mentioned you have a flair for the dramatic?”

I couldn’t breathe. “Th-that’s what his uncle said.”

My mum straightened up. “Lincoln’s uncle? You spoke to him in person?”

“Yeah. Uh…I went to his house. I met his cousin too. Oh, fuck. What if I messed things up for them as well? Fuck!”

“Look at me.” My mum gripped my hand tightly, waiting patiently until I met her gaze. “I don’t know exactly what’s going on yet, but you have not messed anything up. Whatever it is, I promise you, we’ll sort it out. No one is in danger—at least, not any more than we were before, and⁠—”

“I’m going to be⁠—”

“You are not going to be exiled. Honestly, Daniel. We love you. You and Stephen are the most important people in mine and Neil’s lives. You will always come first. Always.”

“O-okay.” I attempted a shaky smile. “I love you too, you know.”

“I know.” She returned my smile.

“But I can’t love him. It’s not possible. It doesn’t make any sense.”

“Alright.” Releasing my hand, she rose to her feet. “I think we need a nice cup of tea. What do you say?”

“Yeah.” Closing my eyes again, I pressed my palm to my aching chest. Instead of pushing my feelings about Lincoln away, like I always had done in the past, letting the hate and animosity override everything else, I took a deep breath and let them engulf me. Distantly, I registered my phone buzzing somewhere on the floor, and my mum picking it up and saying something to whoever was on the other end, but I barely paid it any attention. I was too consumed by my feelings.