Page 152 of Creeping Beautiful

He was yelling at us. Screaming at us. I got up and… I couldn’t see Maggie. I was looking for her. And then I saw her in the garden.

Yeah. She was in the garden.

But she wasn’t in her playground. She was by the shrubs near the big fountain. I started to go over there, but Nathan pulled me back and… I fell down.

Yeah. I was… we were all naked, you know. And I was trying to figure out what happened. So I was going towards the house when Nathan took a swing at me.

Yeah, he hit you hard. And then… then he and Adam were fighting. And then McKay was trying to pull them apart. But he was falling down.

You drugged us, Indie! Why did you drug us?

And then I heard Maggie crying. God. She was crying so hard, Donovan. Remember? Did you hear it?

I heard.

I ran over there. I tried to run over there. But Nathan caught me. He was shaking me and yelling at me. But Adam was there. He was fighting with him again. And I got to Maggie and I saw… Oh, God. She ate the berries! She ate the fucking berries! Why are there berries on that fucking bush? It’s only May!

I don’t know. I don’t fucking know.

She was screaming! Her mouth was all red. It’s my fault! It’s my fault! I picked those berries that morning and put them in the cupcake frosting. I told her they were delicious! I told her that, Donovan! Why the fuck did I put those poisonous berries in the goddamned frosting?!

Adam has her at hospital. He’s taking care of it, Indie. It’s gonna be… It’s gonna be OK.

Then Nathan was there. Screaming at me. He said… he said… “This is all your fault, Indie. You planted those bushes and I told you! I fuckin’ told you they were poisonous!” And it is! It’s my fault!

It’s not your fault, Indie.

It is! It is, it is, it is! And then…

What? What happened next?

No.

Tell me, Indie. I need you to tell me.

I… I hit him. I hit Nathan in the head with my foot. It was a spinning kick. I didn’t mean to… I heard something crack. Oh, my God. Where is Nathan? I broke his neck! I broke his neck! I saw him fall and his head tilted to the side and—

Don’t worry about Nathan. McKay is taking care of it, OK? It’s gonna be fine. Don’t worry about Nathan. This is all his fault.

I killed him! Oh, my God. I killed Nathan. And Maggie is dead! Ow!

I need you to sleep now, Indie. I just gave you more sedative. But I’m gonna tell you something right now, OK? I’m gonna say something very important and I want you to listen to me very carefully. Can you do that?

Mmm.

OK. Good. … OK. Listen to me. You’re not going to remember this. At all. You’re going to forget everything and—

The tape stops. Adam is still holding the player in his hands.

“What the actual motherfucking fuck, Donovan!”

I look up at Adam. But there is nothing left to say. They heard her. They know what I did. And they have to know why I did it. Both Nathan and Maggie died that day and… “Adam. She lost…”

But I can’t even say it out loud. Maybe I didn’t like Nathan. Hell. OK. Whatever. I can admit the truth now. There’s no point in denying it anymore. We all hated his fucking guts.

We were gonna… I dunno. Bribe him to just disappear, maybe?

Some threats if that didn’t work?