Page 36 of The Earl and His Lady

And he held her.

No one had held her since before her husband died. Her cousins had given her a gentle embrace now and again, but it was nothing like this. Nothing like being cradled close, nothing like being enveloped in a comforting, strong embrace meant to hold her together as much as it was meant to shield her.

Virginia dropped her face against his shoulder and cried the harder for his kindness. After the way she spoke to him, judged him, she didn’t deserve his sympathy.

Her tears went from being akin to a watering pot to an all-out thunderstorm, rivaling the downpour from that very afternoon. Again and again she tried to stop, tried to get hold of herself, but then she would feel the arms around her tighten and it would begin anew.

Why were there always more tears? Why hadn’t she left them behind her in Bath when she made her escape from Mr. Macon? Why hadn’t she left them at Christine’s home when she came to this one as a wife?

After a time, her sobs quieted, but she didn’t move. She couldn’t. She became aware of Lucas speaking. How long had he been talking? She listened, feeling the rumble of his deep voice in his chest.

“Cry as much as you need to,” he was saying, his voice gentle, barely audible. “I am here. I understand. It hurts, but it will heal. Crying is only part of that healing.”

Virginia lifted her head from his shoulder, looking up, meaning to apologize or thank him or both, when she saw the most astounding thing. With his back to the candle, it was difficult to make out the details of his face, but she saw the unmistakable glint of tears in his eyes. She didn’t say a word. For a long moment, they only stared at each other.

He cleared his throat and lowered his eyes. Turning, he lifted the candle again and held it aloft before them. “Shall we?”

No discussion about her tears. No opportunity for an apology. From his body language and expression, it was clear he had closed the door on that event. It was as if that moment between them hadn’t ever happened. He continued down the hall, and she followed without thought.

But she held the feeling in her heart, the feeling of comfort and understanding. The blessed feeling of someone mourning with her.

Her exhausted heart warmed behind its barricade, experiencing the barest measure of relief from pain.

Chapter Fourteen

Lucas didn’t expect to see Virginia at breakfast, given the late hours from the night before and the emotional weight she had carried. Still, when he finished his meal and coffee, he was disappointed he hadn’t seen her. How had she fared after they parted in the hall before Phillip’s door? Phillip had been asleep, thankfully.

He’d stood in the doorway, watching as Virginia entered the appropriated guest room. She’d carried the candle with her, putting it on the bedside table. The soft glow had perfectly illuminated her profile when she bent to place a kiss upon her sleeping child’s forehead.

Remembering the sight, his lungs constricted as they had in the moment. Watching her graceful movements, seeing the purity of a mother’s love, had done something to him he couldn’t explain. In conjunction with the tenderness he’d felt for her, holding her as she wept, Lucas’s heart was undergoing a change he didn’t know it was ready to experience.

The breakfast table was hardly a place to examine such thoughts, especially with an empty plate before him and footmen standing by to take away the trays.

Lucas left the table and made for his study, determined to get some work done. His man of business in London had been keeping him abreast of parliamentary concerns and he had letters from the stewards of his other properties to go over. He ought to go through his schedule, too, and see about meeting with Virginia to discuss the barony’s needs.

He settled at his desk and opened the first letter he meant to answer, some discussion of collecting new taxes to aid in the effort against Napoleon. He hoped to share his thoughts with a member of his party still present in London. At least it sounded as though the American annoyance had been dealt with and they only waited to hear back from that country’s assembled politicians.

After an hour spent penning letters, Lucas sat back in his chair and flexed his hand. He had a secretary in town, but perhaps it was time he find one in Annesbury to assist him with his correspondence and business.

He went to the window overlooking the front of the estate. The day was clearer than the day before, though a few clouds dotted the sky. He hoped it would prove warmer, too, for the crops. Perhaps he ought to use the day to visit the farmers on his land?

Virginia still hadn’t met any of their tenants.

With that stray thought, he was plunged back into the memory of the night before, of holding her in his arms.

Going to the nursery the night previous, his intention had been to help, to make right what he had done wrong, and to set Phillip at ease. The boy’s eyes had been enormous when he pleaded for Lucas to check on his brother. Virginia’s obvious relief when Edward capitulated and took his medicine had given Lucas leave to feel he accomplished his goal.

He’d also successfully ignored the fact that his wife had been wearing only a dressing gown over her night clothes, and that her long golden hair reached to the middle of her back in its braid. As a perfect gentleman, he’d offered to escort her back to the family wing.

And then, in the darkened hall, she’d fallen apart.

He well knew the feeling. He’d had no motive other than to offer comfort when he put his arms around her. None at all.

But in the ensuing moments, through the dark hours of the night, and now in the brightness of day, Lucas knew it would be a lie to say he remained unaffected by Virginia. Her tenderness in caring for her children, her ability to remain strong when her heart was obviously suffering, and her quick mind were impressive.

He could hardly call himself a man if he pretended he hadn’t noticed her beauty. The memory of holding her returned but details he hadn’t permitted himself to notice in the moment came back. The way she fit against him, her more delicate structure leaning into his to find strength, called forth his instinct to protect her even more than before.

Lucas closed his eyes and groaned. Being attracted to his wife presented him with something of a problem. She still had months of mourning her late husband before her.